December 5th, 2005

lolpotter

(no subject)

In a customers_suck post about the plecostomus fish (the algae-eater that attaches itself to fishtank glass), ajrbasketcase offered this interesting tangent:

My husband needs to exchange his plecostomus, as it's gotten too big finally. I named him "Don" (as in mafia boss) because he swims around, does his business, and every so often a fish goes missing.
"Missing fish?" he replies. "That's fascinating. Excuse me, I must attach myself to this castle now."
Seal
  • imaria

Liverjournal.com

In a thequestionclub post asking whether or not anyone has accidentally typed "liverjournal.com", shippo theorizes in the comments as to what one might find there:


I am Jack's liver.

Last week, I met Jack's raging bile duct. We went on a date to see a movie, but so far, he hasn't called me back. :(
Current Mood: Sad
Current Music: Dashboard Confessional - Again I Go Unnoticed


("Context" not found)
Me - Suffering
  • topknot

You've been dick cammed!

The ever-eloquent trcabbage has a few things to say about guys who feel the need to inflict their penis on others via webcam.

Is it a form of sex that isn't consented to, a sort of eye and mental rape? I fucked you without your permission..even though you turned it off, you did see it so it counts..you've been dick cammed!

Here there be context (not that it's needed)
  • Current Music
    Johnny Quest theme - Rev. Horton Heat
OT3 1776

(no subject)

In this week's ljdq blunder_buss has this to say on Oreoes. Post here.

"Oreoes. They've finally been brought to Australia, and we tried one to see what the fuss was about AND OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SUGARY CRACK. They say the US is the fattest country in the world and NOW I KNOW WHY."
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
magic wand

Entertainment

xero_sky at the fanficrants community on why she writes fanfiction.



(Authour Laura Ann Gilman) asserts that fan fiction writers are violating copyright and hurting the professionals' ability to make a living.

That's right, baby. I write fanfiction specifically and deliberately to hurt the original authors. Entertain me any further, will they? I think not!



Heeeere Context, Context, Context!
  • Current Music
    To All Tha Dreamers - SOUL'd OUT

(no subject)

safeinmyframe has a religious experience:

There is this disgustingly hot guy who works in my area. I've been foggy on what my ultimate physical type is until now. Seriously, first time I saw him it was like the clouds parted and angels sang and god said "Ben, this is what your boyfriend should look like."

Here
truly happy

natural science lab zombies

My sister foxie posted this a couple days ago and I just had the brilliant idea to share it with more people. She has a (small) obsession with zombies and a tendency to be quiet and then come up with really odd things. The post is friends-only but QWP (entire post is quoted), and demonstrates both of these qualities in her. YAY!

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  • Current Mood
    giggly giggly
Vincent

Mall Mommies..beware!

(T)o the Stroller Army: you do not, in fact, rule the mall. The simple fact of your having procreated does not make you special, and the fact of you charging down employees with your triple-wide stroller filled with screaming brats in the haughty expectation that we will simply move ourselves and all of our equipment for your entitlement-starved ass will not endear you to anyone. Nor will knocking our work equipment over as you shove it out of the way or attempt to force passed it using your child and stroller as a battering ram. What it will get you is a lot of nasty thoughts and prayers for your sterilization.
Original post by Sassette726.
Context? We don't need no steenkeen context!
  • Current Mood
    happy Triumphant

...that's gotta be a pen name.

anandangel discusses her day:

"Oh, wow. I'm sitting in Davis circulation. Nervous Guy (NG) comes up to the desk with a big stack of books.

NG: Um. These are for, uh, my girlfriend. She's doing a psychology paper. Can I just leave these here for a few minutes while I go grab my One Card?
[One Cards are like UNC library cards, and are also used for meal plans, basketball tickets... pretty much everything.]
LEAH: Sure, that's fine.
NG: *scurries away to elevator*

I almost didn't look. I didn't really care. I was doing the DTH crossword. Fortunately, curiosity prevailed.

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Edit: Unlocked. Context: http://www.livejournal.com/users/anandangel/103183.html

No fancy HTML for y'all, sorry.
  • Current Mood
    cold cold
harley quinn

It should be called the "Native American Ocean," then!

In this splendid entry in the community mock_the_stupid, rampagingturtle pays tribute to one of the great educators of her high school career:

"Great Educators of the Twentieth Century, Episode 57: Mr. Jackson

It was in my junior year of high school that I had the remarkable good fortune to be enrolled in a World Cultures class taught by the illustrious Mr. Jackson. Mr. Jackson was a veritable fountain of little-known facts, and nary a day passed that I did not come away from his classroom having gleaned some new, never-imagined bit of understanding of the world outside my limited life experience. The following items are just a few pearls of wisdom imparted by this fine educator:

All Chinese children, without exception, get married at the age of nine.

Jesus, Moses, and Abraham Lincoln were black.

India is nowhere near the Indian Ocean.


One of the greatest regrets of my academic career is not submitting myself to his tutelage sooner, for his students the previous year had had the great privilege of watching a marvelous documentary about the life of early humans in prehistoric times, Caveman, narrated by Ringo Starr and Barbara Bach in the original Sanskrit."

The entire entry is hilarious.
  • Current Mood
    amused roflmiaowing