--bluepard in [Unknown LJ tag]
No, I'm not doing NaNo. I decided to spend November masturbating instead.
Lets face it, the result is the same: we'll all have hand cramps and no one will be interested in what we did all month. The only difference is that I'm actually having fun.
Check out the comments for tentacles and the Orgasmometer. The Orgasmometer probably deserves it's own metaquote, but I don't do HTML.
Edit: You broke the Orgasmometer. Shame on you!
I'm trying to picture my cats as psychic healers. It's not working. Teebo thinks there's nothing a good clout upside the head can't solve, Wicket's not sane (though she's my favorite cat and I love her dearly) and Sam... um. Sam walks into walls, falls over for no reason, is afraid of heights, is spooked by his own tail when he remembers it's there and has been known to lose fights with candy wrappers. Um. Maybe he could be used as a sort of furry crystal ball. He is, after all, spherical.
The link here
When Rob came home this evening he saw an owl sitting on our fence.
I knew it!!!
Where is my Hogwarts letter?!
I must say, I am horrified by the riots in France right now.
How does it happen that such huge numbers of people are so very angry that they resort to such primitive actions to express themselves? I mean, I understand there are things very wrong within their system that have resulted in biased treatment of many citizens, but I can't fathom that anyone feels their violence and vandalism are going to prove anything to anyone. [...] Obviously it began because of the accidental deaths of the two teenagers. But even though everyone recognizes this has gone way beyond that now, no one can pinpoint exactly what is causing the longevity and intensity. Primal instincts and amusement, apparently. Where are the parents of these thirteen and fifteen and eighteen year olds, and why did they not teach their children that fire, guns, and fists were unacceptable?
I have always been a big advocate of the ultimate good in people, but this is starting to make me doubt it.
ODE TO PHOTOBOOTHS (okay, so it's not really a ode..):
What delight, the flashing lights and magical tranformation
that you promise with glitter and glamour
to ugly mannerless girls who jump the damn queue
cause they're bloody blind to my presence.
Damn it, haven't you realised that no one gives a shit
about your oily hair and bitten nails.
I guess that's why you're all jumping to have your picture taken.
Oh, magical photobooth, smite these ugly mannerless girls
and let me take my photo in peace
Oh, magical photobooth, let these ugly mannerless girls know
the true meaning of the word 'ugly'.
Oh, magical photobooth, how I worship you and adore your flashing lights
Oh, please, just please, make these ugly mannerless girls drop dead
or at least down the metal escalators
so I can laugh at their stupidity and ugliness.
Oh, magical photobooth, how can I ever thank you?
Your photos, have turned their heads and now,
Lo, they're leaving! Thank you forever, magical photobooth.
But, what now? Noooo~! You're out of photographic paper!
Oh, how I curse you, magical photobooth.
QWP. Post found here
EDIT: Bah. Why is the html not working?
EDIT2: Thanks. Don't know how I forgot that o.O
4. The intersection of Regent Street and Shaftesbury Avenue in London is more commonly known as what?
"What's the major London street That's in the middle of the theatre district and is really sweet??" - alliterator
"Shaftesbury Avenue!" - wingsister
"You're damn right" - deesarrachi
"He's a bad motheresbury!" - fizrep
"shut your mouth!" - paradoxotaur
"Just talkin' about Shaftesbury" - tarpo
"Then we can dig it" - profsparky
LJDQ Quizlings: No one understands them but their women.
Yep, for those of you who didn't know, or are a little slow on the uptake, he was the model for Robinson Crusoe. However, there was no Friday, not even a deflated volleyball named Wilson. Just a bunch of goats and cats, refugees from Spanish ships. Because a man has, you know, needs, however bizarre, he tamed the goats and cats, and spent many nights teaching them how to dance. There is no record of whether or not he made banana-leaf prom dresses for any of the goats, however.
(Old entry, but still fun reading.)
To which velocityboy replies,
"Some girls de-hyphenate by horse-riding, fence-sitting, or while re-aligning for a dismount at the Olympics when their pre-pubescent and ill-advised eating disorders force a shock-effect on their interior grammar.
Now the age in which girls begin punctuation is generally between nine-and-sixteen. This has no effect upon the hyphen. In fact, many girls opt instead of hyphen interference, to use their colon instead. One must avoid the semi-colon, it is a mere tease. One must use the entire colon: like this."
"every time i bite into an apple i pretend it is chris martin's and gwyneth paltrow's baby's skull."
But then, I also heard some woman in Wal-Mart once telling her friend that Star Wars Episode III was so good that she was sure they'd do an Episode IV, "after all, they left it wide open for a sequel."
Arrgh. My brain!