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LJ's Catch of the Day- Served Fresh Daily!!

That's a lot of stuff...
Killjoy Spin
arisma wrote in metaquotes
In a entry made up of general life updates here , grimraven

Today I am alergic to everything but Tupak and the color yellow. I wonder if there is a world record for sneezing... I may have broken it. Oy.

It's 12:30 right now. Happy Halloween.

I think my brain sloshed in my head, because I cannot think right now. Damnable sneezes.


Last call.
thm wrote in metaquotes
Cut for use of naughty, naughty languageCollapse )

QWP, I hope. (Please don't kill me!)

(no subject)
I have no idea what you're talking about
tajessa wrote in metaquotes
Woo meta-meta!

In the comments to this post regarding breast self-exams...

Cut for sacrilicious thoughts about cancer.Collapse )

No Icon
angelofstrange wrote in metaquotes
in response to this post on vaginapagina in the comments...

i think effexor and lexapro (which i took before) are both supposed to
have low incidence as well. with lexapro, i had absolutely no labido,
so i didn't even miss my orgasm. with effexor, i get aroused, but can't
come. and then i'm sad and make faces like this :'(


"And then I just can't come, and then MY WHOLE FACE TURNS SIDEWAYS!"

(no subject)
furrymouse wrote in metaquotes
rackstraw laments a video clip they found:
You know how JK Rowling always said she wished she'd written the Harry Potter books in the eighties so that the movies would be more like Footloose? Me neither.
The video clip in question can be found here.
EDIT: found out it was someone else, so quoted them. Meep! Sorry, admins! I didn't know!!!

(no subject)
Disapproval Face
mcity wrote in metaquotes
Over at bad_rpers_suck, there is a discussion on spelling.
scraadin:I was recently informed that spelling was only for school.

artheleron: It is! School, jobs, bank account or loan applications, credit card applications, contest entries, rebate forms, common fucking decency on the internet, police reports, insurance claims, lawsuits, spelling your damn name, it only matters in school, right? Next time I need to fill out a form to apply for a job, under reason for applying I'm going to put "bcuz u roxxorz nd i likz vdeo gaemz, expesaly teh fianl fantsy stuph"

Oh yeah man, gainful employment here I come!

(no subject)
springtime the pony
ironychan wrote in metaquotes

Monday ought to be an adjective.
Like.. I am feeling awfully monday today.

(no subject)
angua27 wrote in metaquotes
From pawmerry's journal:

Had some weird dream where i was gonna apply for a job/internship at Hallmark Greetings and the website had all of these places i could go to like Paris, some random country/city i never heard of, and Iraq. Why Iraq i dont know. It seems like the last place that a Greeting Card Co. would go to what with the guns and things blowing up daily. Maybe they could have cards like "Sorry the Insurgents blew up you family :(" or "Have a bomb free Birthday!" or "Allah is Great!"

(no subject)
alligatorandme wrote in metaquotes
This morning, a random old woman on the bus handed me this little slip of paper. Being an inherently polite person who takes things that are handed to me (a practice I should perhaps forgo on occasion), I took what turned out to be a badly color-photocopied picture of Jesus, who appears to have red and blue lasers shooting out of his chest (sacred heart?), with the words, "Jesus, I Trust in You!" on it. Stapled to this is "The Miracle Prayer," "Prayer for Healing," and "Healing Prayer at Bedtime."

It would feel weird to throw away Jesus, even slightly alarming Laser Jesus, so I folded up Jesus and put Him in my pocket. I'm not sure if that is any less sacrilegious, but I didn't ask to be given Laser Jesus this morning. I was not prepared. Perhaps this says more about my spiritual state than I would like to think about.

Also of note is that the woman foisting Laser Jesus on everyone got off at my stop and promptly jaywalked.

- shawk, here

(no subject)
bpcslave wrote in metaquotes
idan_cohen decides to do a meme. And finds out that he hates Winamp.

Magic Winamp 8-Ball Knows All.Collapse )

on pyschos and perverts
ms_maree wrote in metaquotes
On looking for room-mates which aren't psychos or perverts

ms_maree: I was also going to add that most serial killers live by themselves or with their dead mothers in remote creepy looking hotels but it's probably best to have one for a room-mate, you're guaranteed not to be one of their victims, they don't generally kill people they know.

namco_: i'd be really amused if one came with a rocking chair and a blanket over the body with his excuse of:

'I hope you didn't mind me bringing my mother, she won't distburb you - she's only around for novelty reasons'


ms_maree: Can you politely carve someone up? 'Excuse me, I'm just going to hang you on a hook alive, could you please be quiet while I do so. Thanks'

pwaring: 'please stop screaming, i've got neighbours upstairs and it's only a cat scratch'

All from here.

(no subject)
jesus vs buddha
fiercerose wrote in metaquotes
Some hilarious comments to a post in wtf_inc of a scanned-in flyer urging people to support a ban on gay marriage. (Warning: The flyer itself may induce feelings of rage)

gabiechick: That sure convinced me. Now, back to the kitchen I go. Must cook for my husband (whom I adore but not as much as I adore Christ) and pop out a Miracle Baby for the Christian Army. Praise the Lord!!!

rikoshi: Meanwhile, I, the godless heathen sodomite, will just have to gaze in through your window with my greedy homo eyes, someday wishing that I could just break on into your house, still your Miracle Baby, and raise him to be a good, greedy little cocksucker for the Agenda.

(no subject)
[olivia]  alone in our castle
svz_insanity wrote in metaquotes
Cut for politics Collapse )

First, I laughed because it was funny. Then I winced because I realized, "Damn, this pretty much hits the spot..."

Context? Here you go .

The Spirit of Halloween haunts this week's LJDQ.
polar bear paw
angledge wrote in metaquotes
Spooks, ghosts, & spirits were the theme for the Quiz this week. Highlights:

In a pivotal match against the Wolverines, Red Grange ran four touchdowns in the first 12 minutes and rushed for 405 yards throughout the game. What nickname did this feat earn him?

"I don't watch sports. Unless the men get sweaty and start slapping each other's asses. In which case, I watch with rapt attention, waiting for them to start making out. Maybe they'll have a wet tshirt contest and a pillow fight. In my mind, all sweaty men become lesbians." - jedimartini

Which book by Norton Juster has Milo encountering such curious characters as The Whether Man, The Dodecahedron, and a "watch" dog named Tock?

"If the 'watch' dog went gamboling through the bushes, he might end up with a Tock tick!" - feste

"Ohshit, I know this one! I was the only firstgrader who could read, so the teacher made me read it to the rest of the class during storytime and yelled at me when I didn't make them all sit down and shut up and listen! I think she was a drunk." - the_wanlorn

Who or what would you haunt during your afterlife?

"Irvine Spectrum Theater. 21 screens, including an IMAX. Let's see them catch me sneaking into movies now!" - cmzero

"The Internet.
'By the pricking of my thumbs, something www.wicked-this-way.com's.'
'13 Error: BOO!'" - scifantasy

For more answers (including the Correct Answers), check out our latest post. Then join our evergrowing army of the undead & play the LJDQ!

Where does he get those MARVELOUS toys?
misc - fluffy
j3nny3lf wrote in metaquotes
Apparently, alby has a new toy in his toy box...
Not kid/worksafeCollapse )

(no subject)
firerosearien wrote in metaquotes
meesatrmpt reporting on the doings of the 1-6 Syracuse football team in syracuse_uni:

Football Practice Delayed!!!

Syracuse Orange football practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field.

Head Coach Greg Robinson immediately suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, FBI forensic experts determined that the white substance, unknown to the players, was the goal line.

Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.

(no subject)
nothing_sparrow wrote in metaquotes
acrasie writes: "Is it weird that I want to go to a gynecologist and ask, "Is that weird? Could you check that while you're up there? Where is my uterus? Should I worry about that? What does my vagina tell you?"

Sometimes, I think those guys can read your past and future by just sticking their fingers up there. Like it's a sack of goat bones or a fortune cookie."

How do you know it's been a good weekend?
dalbino83 wrote in metaquotes
You know it is a good weekend when your boogers have glitter in them.
-- haptotrope, in this post

(no subject)
lady tigress
amphelice wrote in metaquotes
Over at customers_suck skybrad's customers are having problems with identifying his gender.

I am a man. Please do not call me "ma'am." Yes we are in drive thru, however there is a screen that shows you inside the room, so you can see me. Yeah, see that guy wearing a tie, with the short hair and 5 o clock shadow? That's me. I am a man. Male. Boy. Creature of the penised variety. Thank you. :)

(no subject)
Stand Alone - Terra
kappuchino wrote in metaquotes
Taken from my journal, my eljay pal keelay:

She pretty much got hit in the face with the Sarcasm Sledgehammer and didn't even blink. [...] She's too busy extolling the virtues of lesbianism and tolerance of everything except the church to pay attention to such things as sarcasm.

Not the best that I could offer up for my first time, but it still makes me laugh.

out of candy.... already?
regina_anne2001 wrote in metaquotes
notgus ran out of candy kinda early tonight...

"I turned the lights off before I had to start passing out beer."


happy halloween all!

(no subject)
sporfle, akotas, ehehe, snerk
mhari wrote in metaquotes
I really need to recalibrate my gaydar. I can't tell the difference between gay men and Republicans anymore.


(no subject)
spasticfirefly wrote in metaquotes
Found in found_objectsCollapse )

demented_pants wrote in metaquotes
"i resign myself to being the crazy lady who has fifty cats, but no human contact. ill just paint and pet my cats... but not at the same time, blue cats could be bad........"


bluestarchild13, my big sis (as in, Adopt-a-Freshman), here. She's.. having a bad time of romance.