October 19th, 2005

saltwater is the cure

(no subject)

In a comment to this read-worthy entry, perich comes up with a funny about what "satire" doesn't mean:

KFC Teller: A good morning to you, sir.
perich: And the rest of the day to you, ma'am! I would kindly have the KFC Snacker Combo, complete with Pepsi carbonated beverage.
KFC Teller: Certainly, sir. Here are your comestibles. But now I require four dollars and twenty-five cents.
perich: Ha HA! I was engaging in satire! Now I shall take this food and depart!
KFC Teller: O! You incorrigible rogue! You rapacious scoundrel!

Cannoli war.

From the brilliant jeffreycwells (the OTHER J. Wells.) Entire post, no context:

"I hope you've prepared, Brock," said the commander. "For this mission, you'll be up against a horde of crazed, rabid pastries."

"Pastries!" scoffed the battle-hardened mercenary.

"You feel confident in your abilities, then?"

Brock chuckled, tossing his cigar butt to the ground and crushing it out with his heel. "Commander," he said, "I eat pastries for
Bucky with shield (CA1)
  • airawyn

If Chaucer wrote "Shaft"

From Fandom High.

Wha be tha blake prevy lawe
That bene wantoun too alle tha feres?
Ya damne righte!

Wha be tha carl tha riske is hals wolt
Fro is allye leve?
Konne ye?

Wha be tha carl wha wolden flee
Whan peril bene all aboughte?

Alle clepe tha carl ane badde mooder-swyver
Speken of Shaft bene I.

He be a man konne unnethes
Namo save is mayde konnes im.
flowers that last forever

(no subject)

A discussion that came about over one of the ten people chaosfae tagged to do a list.

silver_whisper: Even if Roger gets his computer fixed, he'll break it again in a month. He has the worst luck with computers ever. Ask him about the time God killed it with Mountain Dew.

chaosfae: God was it? Mine was mamed by Gatorade, she still feels the effects...

silver_whisper: He claims there was no Dew can or bottle anywhere in the room, yet there was still mysteriously Dew leaking out of the lappy's keyboard. I have no evidence to corroborate this claim, but that's what he says.

chaosfae: those sneaky mountain dew monsters
bsg - said the joker to the thief
  • djcati

(no subject)

sephikun has some ... plans for the London Expo.

Was texting myst about expo plans today

Sephikun says:
hire me a whore for expo
Myst says:
Sephikun says:
or a wench
Myst says:
hehe that I can do but I think being that I cant spell you'll get a wrench
Surprise kitty

(no subject)

athenapitiesyou on Gak.

I like gak...that's right, nickelodean gak. It makes great farting noises that make me laugh even when things seem to be crumbling all around me. Example: Oh my god! My bestfriend just graduated without me, someone ran over my toe with a tractor, and I have a really bad paper cut on my tongue!! (insert gak fart noise) HAHAHAHA! Now everthing's ok! That fart noise was so funny!
Listening and not caring

Of delusional fangirls that desperately need shock therapy...

In a post made by fisah concerning whacked out teenage fangirls who are a little too obsessed with video game characters and Japan, found here, haro had this to say.

Ahhh the magical land of Japan. Where there's definitely no such thing as child pornography, business men don't piss in people's yards so often that many residents have "No urinating" signs up, and everyone is 'WAIWAI' obsessed with sugoi kawaii anime and cosplays during the times they aren't skipping around in sailor fuku and waiting for love beneath sakura trees.

I want to go to Japan too, but I can't stand the 'JAPAN IS GOD'S GIFT TO THE WORLD AMERICA AND EVERYWHERE ELSE SUXX0RS. JAPAN IS UTOPIA,' people.


Of course, QWP.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
  • jaie

Furry sign language

So, one of my roomies (A gay male fur, how rare...) just toldme he's off to pick up his car and his mate, but in telling me he was picking up his mate, he makes his hands into a downward 'V' shape and pumps into them. Which led to the following exchange:
"So, you're picking up your vagina hands?"
"My WHAT?!?"
"Your vagina hands. Or, since we're in a furry household, would those be pussy paws?"

furrymouse here.
  • Current Music
    - DDR(Dance Dance Revolution) - TaQ - Era (Nostalmix) .mp3 []
Tenna (laughing)

Lord of the Dunce

from ginmar:

You know who Michael Flatley is? He's this Irish-American guy who is to Irish Americans what Michael Jackson is to allegedly black people. I mean, as far as the tacky outfits and the self-aggrandizement and the oversize ego go, that is. He doesn't molest children. I guess. What he does is molests vast segments of the television-watching population with his God-awful creations. He's like a sort of leprechaun who moonlights as a chippendale's dancer, with all that implies---leather pants, oily skin, and a smug expression.

It gets worse (better?) from there.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused

Hurricane Wilma

From crevette, somewhere in West Central Florida:

Poor Jim Cantore. He must have no clue where to go. I feel for him. Really.

Seriously, though. You know you're fucked when Jim Cantore and The Weather Channel crew come to town. Chewing tobacco breath on the back of your neck, lube free, no dinner bought first, no kissing or snuggles afterwards bent-over red-neck lovin' cornholed. That is the fucking you're going get when Jim Cantore comes into town.

It's sad that such a nice guy and such a HAWT guy is essentially one of the Four Riders of the Apocolypse
me; deep cove

Crackton, next stop, Crackton

umboula invites me to come see her friend's band play in the worst part of Vancouver (Hastings and Columbia, for any interested parties) on Friday:

"Jen, apparently you would be coming to Quinzy to prevent Adam and myself from being raped.
Its funny cos its true."

godfrei (Adam) responds:
"...I read that as if you said Jen was going to stop me from raping you.

I laughed at first, then felt really creepy."