"If you're assigned to a post and cannot take me to them (not that I'm a dumb enough shopper to ask somebody how much something costs, I'm just saying), simply point me in the right direction.
If I get lost, I promise to start yelling for help, or use my cell phone's compass to guide me back to my starting point, so I can try again."
(slightly re-formatted for emphasis)
EDIT: I should mention that what I found amusing was the idea of customers actually pulling out compasses and wandering the aisles in search of product. Maybe little campfires...that sort of thing.
Today's Get Fuzzy continues a two-week series of animal facts in place of the regular strip. However, this strip highlights a part of American combat history the majority of Americans are never asked to pay their respect for: the service of American war dogs over the past century.
Although many dogs have not only been forced or volunteered by their owners to serve but gone above and beyond what can be asked of any individual, there are still recent stories of servicemen in Iraq having to fight to try and get their canine squad members the courtesy of being brought home. America has a dishonorable history of abandoning canine service members when the troops withdraw, particularly during the Vietnam era, despite the fact that these dogs and their handlers are often the first into life threatening situations and have saved the lives of countless U.S. servicemen.
Today's Get Fuzzy strip doesn't mention that although Chips made those and a number of other exemplary efforts in his career as a tank guard (including running a vital communications line through enemy fire) the Commander of the Order of the Purple Heart later had both his honors revoked and Chips was the last U.S. service dog to be awarded honors in U.S. history. (However, numbers of handlers who have received awards in the armed service since have defaulted these to the dogs they work with, some during the awards ceremony.) He also doesn't mention that in the instance where he stormed the pillbox, Chips was not asked by but rather broke free of his handler to do so, qualifying him for the recognition of both extraodinary split-second decision making and valor.
Charlize Theron was spanked and whipped as a child. I'm sorry... I know this is horrible so I'm trying very hard to read this without finding it hot...and I can't do it. I just can't. In fact, I'm going to end this post now, as I lost the ability to function properly.
Please excuse me for a moment...
Under the headline "Katie Holmes is pregnant!!!", they also had the following to say:
That means Katie Holmes had sex with somebody! I wonder who the father is????
My friend got propositioned when she was wearing all black. A man was all "are you working tonight?" Granted, this was at a hotel in Vegas, not at your local mall.
No matter what, disturbing.
You can find the whole thing here:
99catsaway : Jesus sent me a message on Myspace last week.
illlaw : What did that long-haired hippy say?
99catsaway : "hay sexcy pics u wanna chat". Methinks the whole death + resurrection thing was hard on the Savior.
illlaw : Heh. You said "hard on". Jesus is a perv.
99catsaway : For real. I e-blocked him.
illlaw : Awwww. Maybe he needed help with the Second Coming.
( Collapse )
fingerpaint_me: Is it wrong that I imagined saddams lj? Because I mean what else would he have done in that little hole before he was caught.
christyxjane: haha That would be awesome.
Here I am stuck in a hole, hiding from the US. Kinda sucks.
First the sky starting falling and them OMG they found me! OMGWTFBBQ what am I going to doooo????
Love and kisses ♥
QWP from this entry
MUM: Hi, darling, when will you be home?
MAYA: In a bit. It's not my turn to make dinner, is it?
MUM: No, I've just been reading your new story. I went on your laptop and read all the bits.
MAYA: Mum, you know I said touching Theophania was WRONG!
BUS PASSENGERS: ...!
MUM: Right, yeah, whatever. I like your sex scene! I have a few suggestions, however. Since I myself have personally...
MAYA: I am saying this for the last time. Stay away from my internet porn!
BUS PASSENGERS: !!!
MAYA: Don't judge me. I lead a very stressful life.
So, I don't like to post my random Seifer/Zell scenes because without the context there's no... well, no bridge between the fic and the game. There's not the long complicated process of going from Point A (their interactions in-game) to Point B (their interactions in the story). I like to think that some of the scenes would stand okay regardless, but I don't want to take the chance that someone's going to look at my stuff and go, "See? Seifer/Zell is stupid and totally implausible and that is why the author hasn't bothered to show the progression from their in-game interactions to this. BECAUSE IT IS IMPOSSIBLE! SEIFER/ZELL IS THUS DUMB. I rest my case."
And then The Judge Of All The Internet bangs his gavel and all Seifer/Zell stories are deleted. FOR EVER. I end up in Internet Prison, the prison entirely composed of pop-ups.
Moggy: "Oh, no, he didn't tell me he was here to visit with me, he knew it probably would have freaked me out."
Brother: "It would have weirded me out too. But you know what's weirder?"
Brother: "Flying to visit someone and not telling them that's why you're there."
Let's take a chemistry approach to explaining how I make my hot chocolate.
If water and hot chocolate mix were each elements in the Periodic Table, respectively symbolized by W and Hcm, the formula of the compound (hot chocolate) formed by their reaction would look something like this:
It's some tasty stuff.
Some junior high kid emailed me, complaining about the comic... then he threatened to punch me in the cervix.
Not my cervix! The only thing worse could be a swift kick to my swim bladder!
I did mention that the writer/artist of the comic is a guy, yes? Trolls and flamers really are getting lazy...