September 19th, 2005

Whee!
  • rollick

She never meta phor she didn't like

ursulav on the humidity in her neighborhood:

If you get some place with a straight line of visibility for a mile, the world turns white and airbrushed around the edges… this is a dense, fibrous white, like tightly packed bread mold. Summer has evidentally been left out on the counter too long, and it's time to throw it away before the whole bag starts to turn weird colors. Time to go pick up a loaf of fall, maybe with cinnamon. But no raisins. Not a fan of raisins.

(Having been kidnapped and beaten severely by her wayward metaphor, Ursula eventually escapes and crawls back to the keyboard to finish the post.)
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Disapproval Face
  • mcity

(no subject)

Jaki/blackperson in blackfolk//post
Our booth had a bowl of mini candy bars for each sign up. The Campus Republicans has a tray of BBQ chicken. I turn around for 5 minutes and everyone working my booth disappears. Then they reappear with BBQ sauce all around their mouths. In case you missed it, all those Black people signed up for the Campus Republicans just to get some chicken. Of course you know, at this point I WENT OFF!

"AND THIS IS WHY WE CAN NEVER RISE AS A PEOPLE! EVERY TIME WE TRY, THE REPUBLICANS GIVE US CHICKEN!"

Meh. I've pretended to be intrested in an internship at a dolphin-petting place in order to get a Frisbee. Wayne Brady has pretended to be white so he— y'know what? That joke is too easy.
trouble

(no subject)

In a locked post, but QWP, proshowoff on the dangers of flying during bankruptcy:

Northwest Airlines sent me an email about my upcoming 12 hour flight to Canada saying that "we've just filed to reorganize under Ch. 11 bankruptcy. nothing will be affected!" Oh yeah, sure, this is me believing that. "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome aboard the flight that I don't care about anymore, because I'm not getting paid! Couldn't tell you what's going to happen, I'm not even sure where we're going! Could be Canada, could be somewhere else!"
  • Current Music
    Control - Stabbing Westward

Festful Experience.

On Saturday I went with my mom and her boyfriend to the "Harvest Fest" my little town was holding in the town square. Apparently we've harvested lots of hot dogs and chicken wings. I got a chance to see all the people of my town, and they are all ugly. The only attractive person I saw was a gorgeous young guy who was working at the Evangelical Christian booth. Good thing I'm married, or else I'd be an Evangelical Christian right now.

--valerie_z in a locked entry, qouted with permission.
  • Current Mood
    silly silly
  • nodrogg

The House Is a' Rockin'...

My friend versipellis has a house party.

My housemate and his friend are so drunk it's not even true. I mean they're like cartoon drunks. I am feeling superior at my teetotal status... while they have just spent the past quarter of an hour throwing up... But if they've done anything to my George Foreman grill, I'm going to jab them in the eye with a fork...

Hmm. Tom is about to do something bad to his friend's camera. Possibly throw up on it. They've also thrown up in the kitchen but I don't want to investigate that right now. Oh, and there goes the fire extinguisher again...

i find your lack of pants disturbing

(no subject)

seraphic_slayer has had an interesting day...

"So I'm lying on the floor, minding my own business, and I go to scratch my arse. Suddenly, I realize that I'm pulling at the drawstring of my sweatpants.

In the back.

I have my pants on backward.

So I'm lying there, giggling over my own stupidity while trying to figure out how I put my pants on backward when I hook my finger under the front of my pants as I'm about to pull the off and turn them around.

When I realize...I have my underwear on backward too.

I have my pants AND my underwear on BACKWARD.

And they've been like that for HOURS.

I can't work pants. I can't fucking work pants. This is one step away from me having be locked up somewhere while I drool into a cup. I'm surprised I could work the computer well enough to get this entry written..."
  • Current Mood
    amused amused

Timber! Or Fore! Something!

annlarimer lives in the funnest neighborhood ever!

Our new neighbors, whom we sensitively refer to as "The Asians," cut down all the giant dying pine trees left them by the previous owners. It was keen to watch. One guy climbs the tree, with one of those tree-climbing harnesses and an assortment of saws, then works his way down, cutting as he goes. Two-foot stumps drop from the sky, occasionally brushing a power line, and sawdust falls like snow. It's rather like an episode of Due South re-enacted by the Cirque du Soleil. We are in awe of The Asians.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Doctor Who - WWTDD? (neutron flow)

Shivering Timbers — 'Cause Pirate-Speak is an Important Skill

Haven't been here in a while, but I had to share the golden words of my pirate friend, laurasubby.

Yarr, today be the day I be waiting from 2pm till the clock strikes 5. Me booty is en route on some scurvy, land-lubbing UPS truck. Arrr. When the doorbell sings her song, I shall set sail for the front entrance, and greet the men heartily. I be keeping my door open so I be sure to hear that sweet song, for the doorbell sings softly, it be her way.

Arrr, indeed.

[Edit: Posted w/ permission, of course. Here's the post.]
  • Current Music
    "Second Wind" — House of Red [House of Red]