wesa has a solution to such thickheadedness:
Tim should go grab Tim and both go to her desk.
I would pay money to watch her explode.
In other words, the next time you write "Johns favorite dish was his mothers spaghetti and meatball's," I'm going to beat you senseless with a first-grade English workbook until your brains scream Fist of the North Star attacks. In Japanese. With subtitles.
"I don't think a stop sign ought to be there. Everything else on the roads leading up to this one indicated to me that the sign would be on the road coming the other direction, therefore, I don't have to stop because that sign really isn't there to begin with. The roads I designed in my head are better than the real ones."
Okay, on that last line, if you're in Wisconsin, chances are it's probably true but that's not the point.
...I just woke up from a dream in which I beat Jesus in a foot race.
I don't think there are words for how awesome that was.
Reuters and AFP are reporting that the French Government announced
yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "run" to "hide."
The only two higher levels in France are "surrender" and "collaborate."
The elevated alert level was precipitated by the recent fire which
destroyed one of their white flag factories, effectively disabling their military.
you can check them out here
Plus, the dentist and his cohorts always leave the room when they X-ray me. They make up flimsy excuses, like "I have to go put my socks in the dryer," or "I think the cat is throwing up." Then they flip the X-ray switch and race out of the room, probably to a lead-lined bunker.
Avenge my death.
I completely lack girlfriends in Buffalo and thus can't ever find anything in the mall. (Just you try getting anything coherent out of your boyfriend when you're trying on jeans and just don't know about the fit. "Do these make me look fat?" -- "Augh!"-- "Get out from under the bench and answer me you twit." Not productive.)
I have a new policy (well, over a year old, but new-ish) for spellbeggers: give them what they're asking for. Most of them don't actually *want* spells; they want someone else to wave a magic wand and say "abrakazam; problem-b-gone!" and have it be effective. They certainly don't want to do the spellwork part themselves.
Someone on a forum [...] said that s/he had problems and was begging for a "luck spell." Of course, this person didn't bother providing info like "what kind of problems" or "what religion s/he follows" or "what kind of magick, if any, s/he normally uses."
Fortunately, my Eris-fu is undiminished by such problems. Discordianism is a very ecumenical religion, and Erisian magick works for everyone.
And as it happens, the spell itself is a lot better considered and (amazingly enough) more sensible than many crafted by 'serious' fnord spellworkers:
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