June 15th, 2005

apoc

the starbuckian rules

You may or may not know about the Drama going on with HMV and Alanis. This is from seraphic_slayer's lj here
Guess he won't be coming in for any lattes...
So it begins with this. For the too-lazy-to-read the basic gist is that HMV, a Canadian music store company, decided to get uppity with Alanis Morissette.

Alanis signed a six week exclusivity deal with HearMusic a division of Starbucks, so her CD, for the next six weeks is only available in Starbucks stores. HMV got pissy about this and decided to pull all of Alanis's albums from their stores...as if that would actually hurt her.

It wouldn't.
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scissors
  • jaie

From the Hammock

From the amusing journal of lesa while discussing her day here (bold is mine)

also have my washer back, since Doug, the plumber called today and said he
could swing by early and dig and see what was wrong with the trench...seems that
I unwittingly put the pool on top of the trench and it was just too much
weight...Duh Huh!!! Hence we moved the pool and everything is peachy keen
now...
Note to self: Remember where shit is so you don't accidentally fuck up the various functions of the house

Note from self: Do shut up you whiny bitch! Everyone makes mistakes!
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
default
  • perpet

It means "Chain of Command", seriously. No, SERIOUSLY.

caribbeanblue takes on the rules of a "Love in Action" refuge camp [read: turning queers to straights, as the Lord intended].

Men may not wear any jewelry (other than a watch and a wedding band) unless approved through a C.O.C.

C.O.C., ring, oh, the jokes are endless. *cough*

All C.O.C.'s must be signed

Oh, let's stop there.

Computer stations are normally available on campus when clients need to type something.

Like a suicide note?



whole post is here, and hysterical.
  • Current Music
    Shrek soundtrack
Me: umbrella

(no subject)

nightwish_fan and I were talking on msn about us meeting up when me and mum go to London next week, and she started thinking about some text messages we sent back and forth a while back when we were playing around with the idea of meeting up. Basically, she's bi and I'm bi, and we ended up talking about kissing eachother and stuff. Anyway, so this conversation starts:

moonykins: I just think it'd be weird kissing you, since we're friends. It would be the same kissing Viggy. Weiiiird. I just can't imagine what it would be like, lol
nightwish_fan: lol i know!
nightwish_fan: it would be so weird
moonykins: yeah. I bet I'd start giggling
nightwish_fan: close our eyes and iamgine Johnny Depp?
moonykins: lol!
nightwish_fan: actually that might be even more weird!
moonykins: lol yep
nightwish_fan: "Do I feel boobs, omg, johnny!"
moonykins: "hmm, Johnny, whenever did you become a
hermaphrodite?"
nightwish_fan: "Being on a ship full of pirates changes a man...."
moonykins: "Indeed"


Not quite sure which one of us made the funny, but I think the whole thing is the funny anyhoodle, so it doesn't matter. Or something. My head hurts.

The whole post is here, though there's nothing much more funny there, just talking about the trip.
  • Current Music
    Heya ~ Outcast
Random - Trippy Colours

(no subject)

jenni_knightess's 3-year-old realised yesterday that she'd "lost" something. (Locked post/QWP.)

I knew this would come up eventually...but I was kind of hoping not until she was...TWELVE...anyway, I was giving the baby a bath, and Tay kept screaming "there's an owwie on his butt"...and believe me, I was confused. I asked her where's the owwie, and she kept pointing to his penis, so I told her, no, that's his penis. That's how he goes potty. So she says to me, "I have a penis too?" and I said no, but before I could say anything else, she goes "I have 2 penis!" again I said no...and I was going to explain it to her, until she started running around screaming and crying "I lost my penis!!"...so now she's saying "Baby brother no owwie on his butt, that's a penis....I lost my penis." ::facepalm::
  • Current Mood
    giggly giggly
Pretense?, J.H., Sangria

Liquid Courage

victoriana elucidates on the subject of drinking alcohol in fanficrants, and in the course of describing what it's like, for the littlies, she injects this personal sidenote:

And for the record, I still think gin tastes like Christmas and hate.


Also, as a bonus quote:

Have you, thus far, seen Sailor Moon doing Irish Car Bombs?


Now that the possibility has been mentioned, I demand to see this.

Metameta

Thanks a lot. I used to have an inner child, but after seeing this she DIED! DEAD! ROTTING CORPSE! Because of this I am no longer a grown up, I am an ADULT! Because of you!

- blondebeaker, in response to a particularly disturbing metaquote.

I've got good news, though. blondebeaker's inner child may have been power bombed into the fucking sun, but she just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico!
merchgirl

food fanon

from azurelunatic:

On the phone with amberfox a few weeks ago, I mentioned the mushroom recipe, and how I had to re-create it, and how I had a decent chance at doing this because I'd gotten a decent schooling from Dad in the ways of basic Chinese cooking. This led into the differences I noticed between real Chinese food and buffet-style Chinese food. Specifically, I pointed out that crab puffs, which have cream cheese, couldn't be "authentic", because of the traditional Oriental attitude towards milk and its food value (nil). But they're an accepted part of Chinese cookery now, at least in takeout and buffet restaurants.

"They're ... they're ... they're fanon!" I declared.

amberfox cracked up.

After we recovered, we explored this new analogy. The authentic places that serve any ethnic food the way you could find it in the source culture are canon. The things that everybody think of as being authentic, but you'd never find in the source culture, or you'd have not found it there five years ago, those are fanon. Things like french fries at a Chinese buffet? Those? Those are Mary Sues.

I think pre-made chocolate chip cookie dough is a Mary Sue on the field of American cookery to start with. To wrap that like a wonton and deep-fry it (given that I suspect deep-fried anything is a bit fanon when it comes to authentic Chinese cooking)? That's a Darth Mary Sue.

(And it's so good.)

Just for the taste of it....

lolleeroberts, commenting in a f'locked discussion of the new variants of diet cola available (quoted, of course, with permission>:

Actually, my diet drink of choice nowadays is Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper. ziactrice and I refer to it as liquid crack.

I might be in trouble sometime if I'm stopped by a cop and he finds my shopping list with 4 bottles of crack listed next to the bananas and saltines.

(no subject)

joanofarq comments on the revelation that Terry Schiavo was blind, a fact which presumably invalidates all the "pro-life" arguments of cognitive function as a result of her being able to visually track objects and people:

Is it a coincidence that the Terri Schindler Schiavo Foundation website has a notice up that it is "undergoing reconstruction"?

In braille, perhaps?
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
stock; they all want to be us

(no subject)

From the amazing twinofhugin, QWP and all that jazz.

10:13 munin: how secure do you think this system is?
10:13 archim: what's the root pass?
10:14 munin:I can't tell you, it involves compromising details about your mom and a bunch of sailors :(
Zebra Crossing

It's the amazing half metaquote, half meta-metaquote!

If an overabundance of satirical internet acronym abuse* was ever warranted, it would be now. I know I would have lost the ability to form calm, rational sentences if I had been in her position.

bubbletech explains why she's so adamant about needing privacy while she's writing:

Mum: Krystal's writing a Harry Potter fanfiction.
Me: OMGWTFAMNOTLIARRAWR
Mum: Are so.
Grandma: Oh, nifty. Can I read it?
Me: OMGWTFSLASHFICNONEVERNUUHNONONONO
Mum: Oh, let your Grandmother read it...
Me: Mooom? Can we talk...in there? OMGWTFNOSLASHFICNONONO
Mum: Oh. Oooh. Kay.
Grandma: ?



*It is now mission in life to come up with a satirical internet acronym that denotes the usage of satirical internet acronyms. Because 'satirical internet acronym' is a hell of a mouthful. 'Overabundance of satirical internet acronym abuse' doubly so.
AVG Hawkeye Quiver

On the perils of flying coach

k_glorificus on her seatmate on a transcontinental flight (QWP):

Every time I shifted in my seat she was all “Gasp, sigh, annoyedcakes”. Look, whore, don’t fly in the cheap seats if you have a problem with people’s pillows touching you. I will kill you and sell your organs on the black market.

And really, haven't we all felt that way at one point or another?
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
cosmo_mouse // hugh

Horseyburgers!

Quoted with permission from a private post made by the lovely tasiia:

If I wrote "The Black Stallion"...
*Scene where Alec comes across the black stallion caught up by his harness in the rocks*

Alec: Holy crap! That horse could feed me for months!


fin
Peacock

When your mother is cold...

An impassioned argument here as to if a Goddess is a Patron or Matron, including Latin root words and current English usage:

(The eventual decision was that matron and patron were different words, and Patron Goddess was appropriate.)

hagazusa: How do you matronize someone? Scold them for not having matching shoes and handbag?


gilamonstre: There's a terrifying use of stereotype.

Hrmmm. If I were to "matronize" someone, the scolding would be a lot more oriented to "you'd better take care of yourself or I'll kill you" rather than the patronizing version of "I know better than you, so just listen you idiot".

Heh. Maybe that's the ticket. This was a matronizing snark for a patronizing community!

hagazusa: How about, "I am the Mother of All Things and all things should wear sweaters. PUT ON THAT SWEATER RIGHT NOW!!!!!" ;)

gilamonstre: Deal! Now THAT's matronizing.

Of course, given that definition -- all of the godesses I know really are matronly. ;)

(I asked permission, but it was in a public post, so I lost patience and posted anyway...)