June 1st, 2005

GatackHero

The Crappiness of Connecting to the Internet

chelkitty rants about being forced to use dial-up internet for a little while, and the worst kind of dial-up too.

But oh no, fair eljayers, this is no ordinary dialup.

No, it is not AOL.

No, it's not Netzero.

It's Walmart Connect. Or at least that's what they call it. Basically, it's Compuserve with the Walmart logo on it. Which is basically ghetto-er AOL back in its Punkass days.



And people? It is utter crap.

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random hornblower art...

(no subject)

elvses shares some of the difficulties faced by slash writers:

I would like to clarify why I don't like writing sex scenes. First, the terminology is frightful. I have come across stories that use words like "ass-globes". But really, when you think about it, the less ludicrous alternatives are hardly better. Second, there are pronoun issues. He, him, his. It gets confusing when both parties are he, him and his. Either you clarify and use the word "Glorfindel" seventeen times per paragraph, or you risk mass confusion along the lines of "I didn't know Elves were that flexible...".
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Red Sag

Hollywood gone too far

Okay,

I could tolerate the movie.. I could tolerate the announcement of a Video Game.


But this? (( God I wish I had an image, should've bought the magazine. ))


As my sister and I where getting into register line for the store, we often observe the magazine rack to pass the time, and we spot this in bold, yellow lettering: THE DA VINCI CODE DIET SECRETS!

....

Fuck You, Hollywood ... Fuck you.

saccage, here, qwp.

(no subject)

I haven't thought of posting this on this comm, but after a while, I decided it would do wonderfully. It's wonderful example of lightandashes's beta-ing skills *hugs her and smooches her*.
A few weeks ago, I was flamed (geh, as if that doesn't happen to the regular yaoi fan, XD) and lightandashes decided to beta the flame:

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The flame can be found here and the reply here
  • Current Music
    Bleach OST- Number One
charlie dancing

Punkin the Valiant

mysharonah wrote in note_to_cat about her cat Punkin's late-night vanquishing of the evil mouse:

Last night you meowed and meowed in bed and you were acting really weird. I reached over to pet you and felt something that didn't feel like cat.

It was a mouse.
It was a big mouse.
It was a big dead mouse.
It was a big dead intact mouse.
It was a big dead intact mouse lying in state next to my pillow and thus my face.
At 3 am.


The entire post is hysterical, but my favorite line is I'm happy to report your gift had no strings attached, which is quite a feat considering you're a cat and you like string.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
SMART Blinded me with SCIENCE
  • _skye_

And here I wasted my degree on Physics...

cereta has developed a lovely Food Scale of Opinion in which she rates different types of 'opinion' using food metaphors ranging from Lima Bean and Tomato Opinions through Fast Food French Fry Opinions, to the apex, Steak au Poivre Opinions.

At one point, the post gets hijacked with a discussion of limp vs crispy french fries and cereta mentions she likes her fries with mayo mixed with ketchup. maelithil, overcome with emotion regarding this issue, takes the conversation to the ultimate level:

"I have very specific requirements for my mayo-ketchup sauce. They have been perfected over time. They take into consideration the brand of both the mayo and the ketchup.

It's as close to nuclear science as I'll ever come.

FEEL THE POWER OF PINK SAUCE."
  • Current Mood
    content Fry Sauce! Yum!
Pies Iesu Domine

Is it a Metaquote if nobody actually says anything?

Well, there's an actual spoken word (two, if you count the "wtf" at the end), but that's almost beside the point. From the eloquent believeitup, who manages to paint a perfect picture of a moment at work, almost without repeating a single spoken word in describing the N(ew) G(irl)'s crush on the supervisor, Joe:


New girl: *needs help*
Me: *stops dialing to watch* [note: I do this all the time. It's more fun to watch people get help than to dial.]
NG: *watches Joe walk around*
Me: *watches her watch*
Joe: *is oblivious*
NG: *waves hand ineffectively at Joe's back*
Me: *smirks*
Joe: *starts to turn around*
NG: :D *lowers her hand*
Joe: *turns away again*
Me: *cracks up*
NG: :/ *more waving*
Me: *sighs*
Joe: *heads for his desk*
Me: Joe!
Joe: *turns around and sees me, sitting where NG cannot see me, pointing to her back**winks*
Me: WTF?

Here.
me

The Capital Mary Sue Of Capital DOOM.

An entry in marysues showed an astonishing NaNoWriMo story that (apart from hosting the most horrific Mary Sue in history) appeared to have every word capitalised. And no, it wasn't WRITTEN WITH CAPS LOCK ON OMGZLOL, but every individual word had it's first letter capitalised like a name. Spawning the following thread(and a bit):

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Whole post here: http://www.livejournal.com/community/marysues/1863369.html
Bunsen
  • dougs

Naked northerners.

childeric, learned fellow that he is, tells us of "a richly hilarious series of Old Norse-derived placenames or personal names indicating absence of clothing". He goes on to say:

"There are times when I admire the robust dynamism and superb energy of early medieval Scandinavians, but there are other times - and those quite frequent - when I do wonder if they got much above the level of a rugby club after four or five pints. History - mercifully - does not record their jokes about farting in any great detail, but I bet there were loads."

I'd link to it, but it's friends-locked. Quoted with permission.