Metaquotes

From a thread found in marysues, the wonderfully snarkilicious nirvanadonna brings us a giggle regarding the exsistance of Orc Mary Sues...


Ha. Mary Sue Orcs. I actually laughed out loud.

"Her name was Sparkle Princess Sunshine, and she was the most beautiful orc ever. Her hair shone with the golden fire of a thousand red-hot pokers, and her skin was as lumpy as the beautiful and majestic mountains of Middle Earth. As soon as Frodo saw her, he knew he was in love. As did Legolas. And Aaragorn. And Gandalf. And Gimli. And that talking tree."




~Ami

Part of eridanusus's post in customers_suck where she blatantly steals a reference from the best Disney movie of all time when serving a customer:

Squashed banana!
We had a foreign couple through. "What language is that?" I asked curiously.
"Swahili," said the man.
"Oh! Asante sana!" (trans: thank you very much)
This bright, surprised look came into his eyes. "You speak Swahili?"
"Oh, no, that's all I know. Well... also 'You're a baboon and I'm not.'"

Read the rest here.

From the LJ feed of Neil Gaiman's blog

I took the Which SF Writer are You? test at http://paulkienitz.net/skiffy.html -- and was delighted to learn that I am apparently Chip Delany. Who knew?

metal_justice, from the ever-quoteable sages_of_chaos, has a little thought going through his head about the possibilities that run rampant in the Nexus... You have to remember, that metal_justice is a proponent of the whole "KILL IT WITH FIAH!" philosophy...

Should I hunt down Trogdor the Burninator and use my Weapon Copy on him?

Read the the whole post here.

Blues, here, ruins the fun a bit, however.

"Yay for creepy, pale, sexy, depressed British musicians. I hear this one eats nothing but potatoes."

I dunno. I found this amusing. I yoinked it from <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/users/insomniacjack/">insomniacjack</a> He was talking about PJ Harvey.

In this entry, holy_whatever and I discuss the finer points of fatdom. Her last comment, made me cackle so hard I threw up that whole, live chicken I just ate. because OMG--I'M SO FAT BECAUSE I LOVE FOOD TOO MUCH < /bitter >

< funny >

holy_whatever: Well, for me it's like "Hahaha that's ACTUALLY HOW THEY THINK ahahaha." Like the whole absurdity aspect.

eimran: Exactly. I used to be friends with a girl until I found out she was pro-ana. Mostly because I couldn't deal with her twisted logic about food since a friend of mine nearly died from anorexia a few years before.

But I gotta say: As a fat person, sometimes it's nice to be "seen through" and "like I don't exist" ... It lets me get away with the most horrifying of things. And now, now that I know the pro-ana mentality: I'm totally blaming the skinny bitch with her finger down her throat.

In the end, I win. XD

holy_whatever: Oh, I agree. Being fat is awesome because not only can we apparently get away with murder...we're not hungry as well.

eimran: And because we're not hungry *dramatic pause* We have the fuel for brain power to totally think of a rockin' alibi to get out of the crime in the first place.

Silly stupid thin people.

(and now you know the background--here's my favorite part!)

holy_whatever: EXACTLY. And that's why most Mafia bosses and etc. are obese. Because they're geniuses from all the food, AND they're invisible.

---

...Hot damn, she makes me laugh.

Over in wtf_inc, we had a post that linked to an article. The article was by a woman who had been addicted to suntanning, and the ego boost that came with "nice tan" compliments... and how she finally overcame this with the help of God.

A couple choice quotes: ( Collapse )

Wonderful geekage from my friend, angelfire's LJ. ^_^ (http://www.livejournal.com/users/angelfire86/206570.html)

Excidium423: Those who live in glass houses should not throw stones. Cthulhu's house is not made of glass. Cthulhu has plenty of stones. Fear the hour of Cthulhu's return.
GreenFaeryFX: *nod*
Excidium423: Every cloud has a silver lining. However, sometimes that silver lining is actually the gleaming metal talons of monstrous preternatural horrors that dwell within the clouds. Always be wary when looking for the silver lining.
GreenFaeryFX: =-O
Excidium423: Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. On the other grasping appendage, absolute corruption is really a small price to pay for absolute power, and you'll hardly even notice anyway, what with all of the concurrent insanity.
GreenFaeryFX: any more nuggets of wisdom?
Excidium423: http://www.livejournal.com/users/dead_cthulhu/

This paragraph pasted together from a string of comments made by ginalin on bestiality. I obtained permission for this dazzling display of poetic licence.

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indilime posted an anon say anything meme, and the hilarity!

for some background, the Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire movie slogan is, "Difficult times lie ahead, Harry", a Dumbledore quote from the book. however, when WB released the poster, they left out the comma. fandom had a field day. they fixed it pretty soon afterwards.

Anonymous: oh and indy? WHO THE FUCK CARES IS THERES NOT A DAMN COMMA! it's HOLLYWOOD NOT ENGLISH CLASS! SHIT! they don't put commas in their slogans.... it just doesn't happen. It takes away from the dramatic effect.

starfishmedley: Oh, I dunno. Whenever I see movie slogans without proper grammar, I always kind of imagine a "lol" or "omg" after it. Like, "difficult times lay ahead harry lol." ...

It is amusing to think about Dumbledore saying that, though, so I suppose it's not without merit.

You know he'd totally be like that online:

boywholived: Professor? My scar hurt again.
dumbledorexcore: omg dont worry harry im here 4 u!

HEE.

pizzapotcub leaves a short note to spam in this post, hoping that they somehow find it.

Just a quick note to "bulk"(/spam) emailers.

I have absolutely no interest in MILF mania, MILF madness, or mature MILFs. I wouldn't mind getting info on milk mania, milk madness, or mature milk (that's cheese, right?), you can sign me up for that.

Thanks for your time.

Your pal,
Evan

gramarye1971 continues to win at the Internet with this gem:

In the process of taking notes on Hugo Young's very excellent book This Blessed Plot: Britain and Europe from Churchill to Blair, I came across this particularly revealing sentence:

'"I knew just what I thought of Hitler," Margaret Thatcher recalls in her autobiography. It is hard to decipher, as one reads this work, how much of it is a genuine recollection of the time, and how much the pasted-on hindsight of a retired politician.' (308)

I'm sure you all know what's coming next.

On this starwars entry, predictions of LJ-cut fanatics appear:

jaymosch: lol, I bet the lj-cut police will come knocking on your door.


amplifiedmouse: Probably.

Or the Dial-up police, but they take longer to get there...