May 10th, 2005

two consecutive posts

by wild_boys:

9/5/05 09:21 pm - Hahahah I suck. Ahahahaha

I went to Bébés Nageurs with Saba & Zöé. Zöé's big cousin gave her a lollipop, and she asked me to unwrap it. And, being a clumsy oaf as I am, I unwrapped it and it bounced merrily across the floor of the swimming pool changing rooms. Had it been my kid, I'd probably have licked it and given it back to her, but Saba once washed her own hair with bleach because she went on holiday with kids that had headlice. So I confiscated it. Imagine the three-year-old pouting and tragedy. Imagine the sulking. She's too polite to like, scream at me, but she drew back as though I'd burned her and said she wanted her mummy.

Mummy apeared and took charge, and got another lollipop, an orange flavoured one, and Zöé has forgiven me tentatively on condition I bring her a lollipop tomorrow.

And so, here I am, at home. And the confiscated lollipop was in the back pocket of my jeans. And so there it was. Erm.



I deserve verrucas on my tongue.

9/5/05 09:22 pm
[no subject]

Mmmm it's strawberry. Mmmm.

On the wisdom of living like a video game character:

In response to a link I posted about living life like a video game character, scapegoat_5 gives me this pearl of wisdom:

If you find a switch, press it no matter what. If you don't now, you'll later find that you were supposed to and have to come back (this could be anything. light switch, garage door, toilet) If there are multiple reversable switches, look for a conveniently placed console nearby that will not directly tell you what each switch does but show you the result of them. Then keep flipping them around until you have the optimal setup for continuing your journey (whether it be to the bathroom, your bedroom, or just outside. Houses can get pretty tricky!)
  • Current Music
    Final Fantasy VI - Celes' Theme
Death smiling

(no subject)

In a comment thread about book recommendations, shashalnikya managed to make me choke with laughter with the following summary of the first book of Sandman:

Preludes and Nocturnes, right? It can definitely be skipped. Here's the plot:

MORPHEUS: I'm trapped in a glass thingy by magic. Now I'm out. Where's all my stuff?
LUCIFER: I have it. Come fight me!
MORPHEUS: Okay. I win.
DEATH: You suck, Dream. I, however, am awesome.
MORPHEUS: You're right.
(kid with soccer ball gets killed)

One for the geeks...

In this recent post from tolkiencub, he recounts a recent emergency trip to the grocery store with his partner, when suddenly...

In the parking lot was an SUV with a Utah license plate reading "Zahadum" - I shrieked like I was being killed, and Alfredo drove off quickly.

And yet, from looking at him... I just can't picture him shreiking... causing mass riots and making others shriek and run in fear, maybe. But not him.
Porn!Dalek, Doctor Who porn!dalek

Exam time for ladyjaida

Listening to the Willow soundtrack while doing the first three moves of tai chi over and over again -- it's all I remember -- in order to calm down before my Japanese final. This says a lot about me, mostly that I really should have gone to a hippie college where they give you a gold star and some pot instead of grades

The archetype of snark: structuralism redefined in fandom.

If you read sages_of_chaos, the hilarious advice column where advice is dispensed by fictional characters (and real live people not in character), you might be familiar with the war between Namor, the Sub-Mariner and the Joker (yes, that Joker). Last night in this brilliant post, Lex Luthor announces an adjunct community just for supervillains. Namor and the Joker then lay out a typical exchange:

Namor: Image of boat, possibly with one-line comeback.
Joker: Snappier wisecrack, followed by pointing out that "Imperius Rex" isn't a comeback.
Namor: Irritated remark only somewhat related to useage of "Imperius Rex" in conversation.
Joker: Discovery of sore spot, continued needling of same.
Namor: Angered claim of nonchalance. Abandonment of thread.
Joker: Continued needling, perhaps with derogatory reference involving Sue Richards to ensure response.
Namor: Angst.
Joker: Complete and total non sequitur that somehow manages to still be insulting.
Namor: ((OOC Comment))

Then Melian, a Tolkien character, gets involved.

The whole thing is brilliant.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
octopus faery

(no subject)

Meta-meta'd from this post. :D

Life is like a video game. It's life imitating art imitating life or something deep like that.



ENGLISH TEACHER: *casts "Your essay is late"*

JACK: *casts level three "Bullshit"*


ENGLISH TEACHER: *casts "Responsibility Guilt Trip"*

JACK: *summons Procrastination Force Monday!*


Gain 30 Grade Points! Gain 15 EXP! Learned "My Computer Crashed"

-- what_the_jack

(no subject)

Samsung's "female-friendly" phone complete with 'fatness calculator' stirs up controversy in vaginapagina here

anwyn18: "You know, I used to be appalled by the fact that it seemed like marketers thought we really were all stupid. Then I saw an ad for a foundation that promised when you applied it you would be "rubbing happy into your skin". Literally it was claiming to have pytoendorphins or some such Star Trek-esque made up pseudo science name, that would make you happy by being absorbed into your skin through your foundation.

My Appall_O_Meter just went through the ROOF at that one, and I finally realised that I was right all along, and became resigned. Marketers DO all think that women are stupid. REALLY REALLY stupid."

puliqueen: ""fatness calculator"? why would i want to calculate my "fatness"?"

dorothymonkey: "So that you can compare with your friends, of course! It's the next big trading game; it's pokemon for women!"

blackbyrus: "Well, since you don't have dicks to compare sizes you gotta have something to make each other feel inferior about.
(is now imagining cards with Chubbosaurs and Flabachus) :P"
  • Current Mood
    amused amused

(no subject)

From attack_bunny. This one's not from a friendslocked entry, I remembered to check. Gold star for me!

My school's prayer group has renamed itself. They're now the Girls For God. Or, as it says on the dozens of posters they've got scattered around the school, the Girlz 4 God. I'm sure you all know what I mean when I mention my deep and burning desire for a red marker pen. Alas, none were to be found and I was forced to suffer.

Edit: link fixed. This is not my week.
stealth whap

(no subject)

"God, I hate people who mark spoilers several years after an episode has aired, or a season has finished. If you haven't seen it by now, you're going to have to deal. It's like the ex-coworker who didn't want me to spoil the ending of Troy. Look, it's been out for thousands of years now. You're just going to have to deal." --havocthecat (from a locked post, with permission)
just breathe

Ah, Orlando Bloom. Long may he suck!

The inimitable irradiatedsoup, on her favourite Walking Target:

Today someone on my flist had an Orlando icon that says something odd about how he can act, so there. It made me giggle, because it's totally supposed to be ironic right? RIGHT?! I love you flist, you're so sweet and adorable and kind to Mr Bloom, and it's like you never give up on him being a half decent actor. One day he'll show them! One day he'll make himself look ugly and win an Oscar! Keep on clapping! It might even be in a role that doesn't require a skirt, or milk, or eyeliner!