February 7th, 2005

untalkative bunny
  • kimera

Vegan! VEGAN!

a lot of vegans come to Wendy's for some reason. They can't just say "no cheese", they have to say "I'm a vegan, so no cheese. Because I'm a vegan. And vegans can't have things like cheese, and I'm a vegan. So no cheese for me, the vegan." And then even once they get the food, they ask "Is there cheese on this? Cause fifteen seconds ago when I placed my order, I asked for no cheese because I'm a vegan and vegans can't have cheese, and since I'm a vegan, I can't have cheese on this and I just thought I should remind you because I can't have cheese because I'm a vegan and there can't be cheese on the food you just gave me because I'm a vegan." ~ wassomeoneelse
Peg 2015
  • pegkerr

(no subject)

truepenny has a new theory, explained here:

My new theory is that the night shift in my brain is staffed by bug-eyed neurotic caffeine-crazed overachieving squirrels.

This would explain the dreams.

And when the sloth who's supposed to man the desk for the conscious mind has to call in sick ... well, you can always get a squirrel to sub on short notice. They're eager to please, my night shift squirrels; they just shouldn't be let out alone, or put in charge of anything important
.
Roger

South Americans, not Southern Americans!

Posted by meatbunny in stupidpetowners...

She found a post in another comment and had to comment on their idiocy...the italicized part is from the original post, and the regular text was her response.

We have lots of South American people (From South America) in our area

Is it just me, or is there *nothing* ambiguous about the phrase "South American"? Where the hell else would "South American" people be from, aside from South America? Maybe I'm being overly critical/sensitive, but if somebody thinks that "South American" need elaboration, why should I pay much attention to what they say, in general?

What .coms are good for; a mantra for Valentine's Day

Comment exchange in pokeypenguin's journal, in an entry with a tantalizing subject line ("$750,000"):

    _constantine: I just finished reading Small Gods, towards the end of which the phrase "give me a bar long enough and a place to stand, and I can move the world itself" is mentioned a few times. That quip should be retooled for modern times to begin: "give me a few venture capitalists..."
    larabeaton: ... and a .com company and I can bring the stock exchange to a crashing halt.

History has proved them right.


The first time I stepped into a drugstore in January was like being hit in the face by a bag of pink packing peanuts; therefore the end of this entry in panacea1's journal prompted a fervent "Amen."

    I leave you with a few thoughts I had while wandering through the aisles of $BIG_BOX_RETAIL_STORE last night.

    Love is not manufactured in a factory in China.
    It does not retail for $19.95.
    It does not require foil, glitter, or holographic sparkles.
    It does not need batteries. (Sex, maybe. But sex is not love.)
    It does not come in five exotic fruit flavors.
    It cannot be packaged in shrink wrap.
    It is not available for a limited time only in February.
Angry

First Post

Here is my friend chantrea telling a tale of small-appliance necromancy in a locked post that has been quoted by express permission:

gargirl, I ressurected my coffeemaker! It brought back a message from your mixer...the mixer is very happy where it is, but sorry that it didn't get to spend more time with you and your family. It was about to go and mix a batch of cookies for all the appliances that died young.

...hee! it made me giggle.

You know you're addicted to MSN when:

All you need to know for this is that redfireborn and her sister both have MSN and both live in the same house.



Sister: *goes offline to go to bed*
minutes pass.
Sister: *comes online*
Redfireborn: I thought you were going to bed?
Sister: I was. I needed to ask you one more thing, though. I blocked my whole list so I could just talk to you.
Redfireborn: O_o You needed MSN to ask me something??
Sister: Uhm. Oh. Yeah. I. Uhm. Could've just come to your room...



And mock_the_stupid just seemed to cruel ;).

(no subject)

So... yesterday I threw up my hands in despair at comparative superlatives, and went for a bike ride on the creek path instead.

It was amazing... the floodwaters hadn't quite finished receeding, and everything down by the creek was dank and cool in the sunny late afternoon, with high tide marks in the branches above me showing where the water had been over my head only a few days ago. There were fences snarled and tangled with drifts of broken wood, leaves and rubbish, paths drowned and bridges turned into fords by floodwater! Through the trees I saw local kids splashing in the creek just a bit downstream from the 'No Swimming' sign, and an old couple walking along inspecting the flood damage. I came out into the open where the sun warmed my bare arms and legs and sparkled on the water, and the jolting of the rough path under my wheels as I rode under an old stone bridge near Pentridge made me feel like this was the closest I'd ever come to my silly fantasy of riding through some imaginary better-than-life Middle Ages. Right then, I wouldn't have given fifty cents for all the Latin grammar in the world...

When I arrived at Coburg Lake, I knew something was out of the ordinary. There was the smell of food cooking, a huge crowd by the lake, music and dancing! Some kind of Greek community festival, I think, but mostly what I noticed was the white tents, the fun-fair stalls, bells dinging from the miniature railway, old people dancing in the bandstand by the lake and over-excited kids and dogs underfoot everywhere! It made me think of walking into Bilbo Baggins' birthday party, only better, much better, because instead of everyone being caricatured English rustics, diversity ruled... here a woman in hijab leading a fantastically curly-haired three-year-old daughter(?) by the hand... there a Sth-East Asian family gathered around a portable barbeque... an old Greek man pushing a baby girl in a pusher and talking to her about a dog that was swimming in the lake... there a bunch of kids with bleached hair kicking a soccer ball and loudly discussing the benefits and drawbacks of 'getting with' people at the party they'd been to last night... And the sunlight filtering green through the huge spreading trees and people selling food from picnic tables by the lake, and the music circling up from the bandstand to enfold everyone. I took my helmet off, laid my bike down and sat there on the grass for a long time, just watching people talking and laughing and dancing and eating things and being happy.

I can be silly, see. In the middle of all this working and worrying I'd completely forgotten that sometimes happiness isn't a prize that you work for, sometimes it's just a gift.

From deathbyshinies in this entry.
Smile

Do not disrupt misia's research!

From this post:

May your testicles be clamped hourly into the spiked wire baskets of the deep-fryers of Satan's KFC and plunged into the boiling fat rendered from the worthless bodies of whoever wrote the craptastic software you use for your library circulation management.

Love and Snuggly Fuzzy Baby Puppies,
Misia
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Rose hopes

OH, CANADAAAAAAAA

Oh, how I loathe George Bush. But I love my roommate, sugartherapy

In response to this blurb on Yahoo!News: "President Bush sent Congress a $2.57 trillion budget plan Monday that would boost spending on the military and homeland security but seeks spending cuts across a wide swath of other government programs. Bush's budget would reduce subsidies paid to farmers, cut health programs for poor people and veterans and trim spending on the environment and education. 'It is a budget that sets priorities,' Bush said after a meeting with his Cabinet. 'It's a budget that reduces and eliminates redundancy. It's a budget that's a lean budget.'"

sugartherapy replied:

"WTF?

Bush's new budget is... a lean budget? Well, yeah, if he means its lean like a chicken is lean if you cut off, like, HALF THE CHICKEN!!!!


Asshat. And also?

::sings:: OH, CANADAAAAA!!!!"
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
craziness

(no subject)

From senza in discworld , off this post:</span>

(Original sentence in italics)

... because all those "----ing [whatever]"s might end up "embedded in your brain". I'm not kidding. Those are the exact words.

... Well, yes. I suppose having a row of dashes embedded in your brain could be uncomfortable.

  • Current Music
    Under Your Spell - "Once More With Feeling"
christmas - axial
  • tzikeh

Along with singing, dancing and a lust for knowledge that knows know bonds.

juliefortune, mocking a self-published "author" here:
I dare you to read this writer's bio and not bust a gut laughing. Oh, the self-importance! The purple -- no, the EGGPLANT -- prose! The wretched excess of self-praise!

Here's a clue: She's the self-styled "The Queen of the Night." Mozart called, honey. He said to get over yourself, and oh, by the way, get your ass out of The Magic Flute.