January 26th, 2005

agent may is unimpressed

On the healing power of Phil

[The sub] dropped names like anvils - hard, fast, and downright loony - but how can you not love a guy who's worked with Phil Hartman? Phil Hartman was the JFK of my generation. His passing is of sad, fond rememberence. His humor heals us all. Seriously, go up and ask someone who you really don't like or care for if they like Phil Hartman. If they answer yes, you will find that you like them a bit more. If they say no, punch them in the stomach and run away - they are a loser and cannot be helped.

--gilda_slice takes improv classes with the Groundlings.
Say what?

(no subject)

power_puffs_lab regarding the tabloid "The Star"'s believability factor:

"There is so totally a Batboy. Me and Amazing Girl totally got in on the him and Turtle Lad saving the world from EvilDome Lord of Cheeze, and then went for pizza after. He's so cute! And now Amazing Girl is pregnant with Turtle Lad's litter of Goat Headed Muffin Children. She's so excited. We are making capes for them right now. "
scissors
  • jaie

(no subject)

So I've always been impressed by Jesus feeding thousands of people with just the loaves and fishes. Last week I went to mass for communion and saw what he considers a serving size. Not so impressed anymore.

Read on the journal of:
teareaux
eridanus

I hear you...

From the ever-amusing candy_mclain:

I seem to have this habit. Its called paranoia. Wherein, I, Caitlin, am alone, about to go up a flight of stairs/get in my bed/leave the bathroom when all of a sudden, the hairs on the back of my neck shoot up as though they are a penis having the worlds largest erection, as a result of being near ready to do it with '80s Cindy Crawford, Carmen Electra, and a younger Christina Applegate (Married... With Children) all at the same time, and are on viagra.

Bwaaaaaaaaah. The whole entry is pretty damn funny.
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Codatos!


Turns out that my wisdom teeth possess the amazing ability to, when threatened with extraction, turn ninety degrees and explode in a ball of enamel shrapnel when touched. We lost three dental assistants, driving up the cost of my surgery by at least fifteen bucks. (to cover their education losses)

My fearsomely explosive teeth requiring cutting and gouging to the jawline, and drilling in more places than a Republican-managed arctic preserve. After two hours, nearly a pint of my blood, a pound of flesh that would make Abyss happy, and the aforementioned slain dental groupies, I emerged without wisdom teeth.

In the place of wisdom, they gave me drugs.

Nice, happy drugs that make you mellow, unconcerned of the Siberian stripmine that is your mouth, generally filled with goodwill towards all man and absolutely incapable of rational thought. I sat blissfully on my couch, realising this is what it must have been like to be John Denver.

-- definitely read the whole post by dexfarkin here

RavenMoon

You could say they're rather down to earth...

I suppose it's a quote of a quote, but I found it amusing... Found at acroyear70's page:

from a talk.origins discussion on Latter Day Saints followers and their official views on evolution and other "old earth" scientific ideas,

one posted: [...]the LDS geologists I know personally are overwhelmingly conventional to a fault [...]

another replied: That better have been intentional.