November 5th, 2004

Shock
  • libram

(no subject)

anna: whats wrong with a vibrator?
inna: can't you get cancer?

--vitachka


nightstalker: I shared an elevator with Bill O'Riely yesterday. He looked very smug...
kimpire: Did the elevator at least taste good?

Y'see, what I don't get is why he should look smug. It's almost like the elevator killed Bill O'Reilly's father or something, and by killing it and sharing it with nightstalker he's avenging his father's death.

"Hello, my name is Bill O'Reilly. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

Or:

"Hey, elevator! You're goin' down."
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
  • telaryn

'Tis the season...

Holiday musings by crevette, including this description of a truly religious timepiece...

It was made by the same people who make that annoying bird clock.... the one that gives a different birdcall every hour on the hour.

This clock, however, depicted the Last Supper. Every hour, on the hour, day or night, this clock would play the Hallelujiah Chorus. And I don't mean, "Hallelujiah!" and done, I mean a whole three minute clip of the Morman Tabernacle Choir yodeling that bad boy at jet engine decibels.


Entire post is here.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
smb3

(no subject)

"It's not helping that the Democratic party is composed of a bunch of fools with the fortitude of chewed bubblegum."

--coachdoom, <a href="http://www.livejournal.com/community/ubsa/5866.html?style=mine>here</a>.
  • Current Music
    "Weird Al" Yankovic: I'm So Sick of You
aladdin - pretty jasmine

(no subject)

by futurecfo in a response in the community columbus

I've been telling people if they spent 1/2 the time they do bitching doing something constructive they could make the world a better place. Columbus public schools needs tutors. Animals need homes and taken care of. Parks need maintained. If people think they can change the world by spending 3 minutes in a voting booth, just think if they spent 30 minutes a week with an underprivileged child tutoring them in math and teaching them that there is a big world out there and be a good influence.
aladdin - pretty jasmine

Why didn't anyone metaquote this earlier?

From a response to an earlier post right here on metaquotes by forevergrey in which Australia invades the U.S.:

THE REVOLUTION CONTINUES!

After GW is desposded of, Paul Hogan will make an anouncement from the white house. As the shocked (and awed) American public are confronted with his strong words, strong accent, and their beloved president's body parts strewn round the background, Ninja-kangaroo's will patrol the streets of every major city in the US, brutally kicking down any resistance. Mutant Crocs will swallow whole America's navy, and cunningly positioned crates of beer will distract your standing military until it is too late.

All hail Generalissimo Hogan, supreme ruler of America, now renamed Greater Australis.
beaker

Pissed-off Sexy Gamer Alert!

naamah_darling is having a Terrible Horrible No-Good Very Bad Day.

Shit. Is it PMS? Because emo-PMS this severe should be enough of a Disadvantage on my character sheet that I ought to be able to buy Filthy Rich or Secret Base with it. And yet all I have are a couple of sucktastick minions -- two brain-damaged cats who could not dominate a legless cricket even with help, and a three-legged dog whose only superpower is the ability to annoy his enemies to death with those ninety-decibel flopping sounds his lips make roughly every .5 seconds.

First post here.... *hides*

_projectgalem comments on Bonfire Night here.

Firstly, happy Guy Fawkes! Though I must say, with the amount of explosions going off around me I woke up wondering if Bush had decided to invate England because he opposed our love of tea and rugby! Though thinking about it, Bush would probably be quite proud of the English for having a tradition of burning an effigy of a terrorist who tried to blow up the Houses of Parliament.
Glam!

More fun, as always, with customers_suck

catsluvdmb, on the impending Christmas season full of smartass customers in need of something to cure what ails them (namely, stupidity):

I will declare biological jihad with my bronchitic bacteria to the next customer that strolls into my store and bellows, "It's beginning to look a bit like Christmas HAHAHAHAHA!"

Here.
  • Current Music
    Urge Overkill: Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon