October 7th, 2004

Zarla, Klavier Gavin, Juan Corrida, Frozen AU

Gummi fetuses...

This is a conversation that I had with my friend and roomate tonight, which found so amusing/creepy, that she decided to post it in her journal. I now, with her permission, share that conversation with you...although I promised her I wouldn't link back to her journal. Anyway, here are her words:

RANDOM, RANDOM!!!!
I am pausing in the middle of a game to bring you the screwey conversation of this evening.

Me: have you ever noticed how, if you squish a gummy bear, it kind of looks like a fetus?
MH: Yeah, you know, Spencers would be the place to carry those too.
Me: I know, I mean they already have gummy penises and gummy breasts, I think they would carry gummy fetuses
MH: I wonder if they would ever try to make a gummy vagina....
Me: I don't know, but if they did I know some guys who would try to make it fit.....
MH: I wonder if there are any girls who hav tried to make the gummy penis fit
Me: But they're only this big ::makes a motion that means "little"::......
MH: well yeah......
Me:...........JAMES!!!! COME BACK!!!
  • Current Music
    nothing
through the window

(no subject)

   Kenneth Hite (princeofcairo) talks about Neil Gaiman’s review of Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke and refutes Gaiman’s claim that it is “unquestionably the finest English novel of the fantastic written in the last seventy years.” The entire entry is rather interesting, but the very end made me laugh:

Q: I still don't think you ought to be bagging on Neil Gaiman, Mister Unemployed Star-Trek-and-Templars Doofus.

A: Well, even Homer nods. And I'm sure there was some scabrous Ionian bard who eked out a few obols yarning about mystery cults and trireme adventure waiting to point it out on his LiveJournal, too.

Sex Toys

From naamah_darling:


Field-testing sex toys has to be a blast. I'm not just talking about intended uses, either. I'm talking about dropping them off the roof, stirring milkshakes with it, using them to chase the cats. That sort of thing. It's important to know if your glitter-smeared jelly vibe balances evenly for throwing.
springtime the pony

(no subject)

bgeezus' morning schedule:

4:30 AM - wake up

4:45 AM - eat breakfast. breakfast composes of dry cereal and orange juice. it is a breakfast of champions. who is a champion? ME because

4:50 AM - i type my essay last minute as it is due today at 8 in the morning and

5:54 AM - an hour later, I am done I AM CHAMPION I OWN YAY I WIN

I really need to stop busting this shit on myself. Now I shall go roll in victory.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Freaked, K: DW Nine & Rose

(no subject)

From a post metaquoted earlier about suddenlyfemale!RemusLupin *twitch*...


I think this would be a lot better if Remus kept on liking girls even after he turned into one. Residual magic or something. He could seduce Lily away from James, then perhaps Sirius would discover that he was actually born an iguana and his parents put a spell on him at birth, and we're back to Ranma 1/2 crossovers.

-- phaballa


"Oh my fucking God, now I'm going to have to deal with being a monster twice a month!"

-- mipeltaja (imitating arghgirlnow!Remus)


you know that summer never stopped.

(no subject)

posted with permission from biorhythm

If you're looking for a more adult costume (read: slutty) for halloween this year, try Frederick's. I was there yesterday and I was far too amused. They had a cop outfit I liked, but if I was going anywhere this year, I'd go as a mountie. Or as a nun. A nun with fishnets and a whip. I'm going to hell on a greased pole. As long as it vibrates on the way down.


from this entry.
  • Current Music
    vindicated // dashboard confessional
An Optimists Guide

(no subject)

from cindyjade, with permission.

"I HAVE MADE GRAND CULINARY DISCOVERY!!!!!!!!1

and it is this: if you heat up bread in such a way it becomes a firmer, crunchier, crumblier version of itself. it becomes: blackened burnt GOODNESS.

and there are many things you can do with this new incarnation of bread! YES THERE IS. one might apply an appropriately sized THICK THICK THICK THICK layer of yellow grease or some sort of frooty jam. there is also the sprinkling of sugary cinnamon crystals and the ever popular sopping of one's bowl of TASTELESS oatmeal w/ said invention (making it slightly soggy but still edible!)

why yes i am a genius. and yes, i do need to go grocery shopping"
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    chipper chipper

(no subject)

**actually, by fiddling around with an online concordance(Bible) you can find a great deal of text that features David and Jonathan kissing and crying. it's rather surprisingly like reading about Sam and Frodo.

--cmpriest
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    amused amused
ampersand.

(no subject)

PS: There's been a very interesting discussion going on in my comments about Honeycrisp apples, and now I'm afraid to try one because I know, no matter how good they taste, I will be disappointed because they will not actually taste like honey. It's the iceberg lettuce fiasco all over again.

copperbadge, here.
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    amused amused
merchgirl
  • divabat

(no subject)

from glittersavvy:

I have had this theory for a while, but I only just put it into practice. If you throw glitter at a man, he will freak out and run away! ^^

I think I shall market it as rape prevention. Carry a tube around for self defense. Sure, it *looks* pretty, but you don't want it in your eye. Believe me. I know. I could make billions from guys' hatred of glitter. I tend to shower myself in it if I don't want boys getting over-enthusiastic, because they do *not* want to be covered in shiny bits.

This is also how women know their partners are going to strip clubs, because the dancers are typically doused in body shimmer - which is actually a very strategic idea. Get a lap dance and that glitter *never* comes out. You don't realize, but it's all an elaborate trick to fuck with chauvinistic men. Of course, if you don't have a partner, you've got no problem, but you'll still be covered in sparkly stuff. For. Ever. ^^
springtime the pony

(no subject)

anythingoes, discussing a bizarre line from today's pottersues entry:

Quote:
Then, a herd of Manatees, a very dark creature, stampeded through the ground leaving extensive damage.

For some reason I can picture them sorta going.. flawumph, flawumph, flawumph... as they move.. but stampede, no.


(off-topic, but who is the person with the Scar icon? Or am in the wrong community for that... because whoever you are, I drew you a picture.)
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    amused amused
hobbes
  • crantz

(no subject)

It amuses me how territorial squirrels questing for food in the fall are. I was sitting around in a park, openly watching them and they started creeping toward me en masse. Not just one lunatic squirrel either. No there was a group of three or four who approached, stood up on their hind legs, fluffed their tails then laid the smackdown on me in squirrel chatter.

It was very "You wanna piece of this you pansy assed biped? Better watch yourself, yo. We buried the last three of your kind in the shallow ditch behind the bushes with the acorns..."

-inkysweet
Fire - phoenix flame
  • fyre

Weird kittys

If you ever brush your teeth at my house, check before you spit. Because my cat is weird.

From marabelle's entry here (first paragraph).

When I saw that line, my mind rebelled and decided to make my boss very mad at me. (Evidentally not everone likes water being splorted all over them. Then again, had she not been standing in from of me...)
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Random - Trippy Colours

(no subject)

And while on the subject of cars, I just want to state:
IF YOU ARE IN A TRAFFIC CIRCLE, DO NOT STOP UNLESS THERE IS AN IMMEDIATE EMERGENCY(ie: foolish pedestrian) CAUSING SAID STOP. DON'T JUST SIT THERE AND WAVE SOMEONE ELSE IN. THE WHOLE CONCEPT IS TO KEEP MOVING, ASSHAT.
ALSO - IF THERE ARE TWO LANES MERGING INTO A TRAFFIC CIRCLE, THIS DOES NOT MEAN ONE LANE GETS TO GO LEFT AND ONE RIGHT. YOU ALL GO THE SAME DIRECTION.

*sigh* It's a circle. Not an advanced astrophysics problem, people.


~silverbriar, discussing idiot drivers in a locked post, quoted with permission.