September 23rd, 2004

general: red tide name
  • skripka

feckin' brilliant

Smallville gets recast:

Lana: Ah, Oi hadta come back, Clerk. For skewl, an' anyway, wha? And de Talon, o'course. Plus - an' Oi tell ya dis straight from my fuckin' so-el, Clerk - my hert is in Smaaalville.
Clark (eyes lighting up, reaching one hand up to her muscled arm): That's really good to hear, Lana.
Lana: Yeah, well. It's on'y de troot. Paris lerned me good, Clerk. Ya hafta follee yer hert, not yer bollix, ya know? I lerned thatcha hafta look fooowerd as well as backh, like, but da' der's no place loik howem. Dis is where my jaysus paarents diyed, Clerk. Dey diyed, loik.
Clark(sighs, looks guilty, again): I know, Lana.
Lana: Ah, fuckit, Clerk, cumon an' Oi'll buoy ye a dhrink. De coffee in Parrus was fuckin moighty. On'y massif.

from swanswan here.
  • Current Music

(no subject)

The ever-quotable theferrett, on this Magic card:

But why does the snake have huge hooters?

I mean, snakes aren't mammals. They don't breastfeed as far as I can tell. What is the organic purpose of those gigantic funbags?

My theory: They're giant venom sacs. Oh, she doesn't spit venom, but she kills a lot of men anyway, specifically dumb mammals: "Oh yes. You're totally turning me on, you big competitor for food you. But you know what really gets me hot? When someone sucks on my nipples."

Deep Thoughts

Gender is a social construction. So is eatable food. If you want to expand your notions of gender beyond the male/female binary, start by considering that there are people in the world who eat sheep intestines and kim chee, while you probably eat Twinkies, and work from there.

~ from ladysisyphus's journal
  • telaryn

Hurricane madness...

elfgirl vents on the unique behavior of the current crop of tropical storms here.

"We won't even talk about Jeanne, the storm that is apparently the hurricane world's version of Dori from Finding Nemo, or Karl, the storm that is a little confused about what constitutes tropical. (Hint: it's NOT Ireland.)"

(quoted with permission)
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    amused amused
firefly - kaylee smile

Oh, college life

For the uninitiated, taps is a drinking game that is often referred to as flippy- (or tippy-) cup. It's a relay race in which you chug about two swallows of beer, then try to flip your cup so it lands upside down.

illinidrew, a recent college grad out in the real world, talks about returning to college for the weekend:
apparently there's already a taps game lined up for friday night and probably saturday; i havent played in forever so im gonna be rusty. but playing taps is like riding a bike - once youre drunk, it doesnt matter if you're any good because you're just going to fall and hurt yourself anyway.
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    amused amused

(no subject)

seamusandjamal, in the comments here (regarding getting Michael Moore to speak at our campus).

Next time they're doing the budgets in SGA, stand up in the beginning and say, "HEY FUCKTARDS, IT'S DIFFICULT TO GET BIG COMEDIANS WHEN WE HAVE TO PAY THEM IN IHOP COUPONS"

This is, coincidentally, how we secured Lewis Black for Homecoming.

(no subject)

Someone finally wanted to argue with me after noticing my Kerry/Edwards bumper sticker this morning. Unfortunately that someone was a tiny older lady who was being very polite (though, of course, quite condescending as well), so I didn't feel quite right tearing into her the way I usually do with strangers who take whatever bait I've left lying around.

But when she got truly into the "I'm older and therefore you should accept what I say without question" phase, I calmed my need to fight by staring at her and thinking, loudly, "I am, right this very second, fantasizing about two men ripping their clothes off and going at it like greased rabbits. And it's a beautiful thing."

Not a political victory, but I count it a moral one.

-- firesignwriter

(no subject)

Darth Vader: "You are free to use any methods necessary, but I want them alive - NO DISINTEGRATION!"

Boba Fett: "As you wish."

Peter Falk: "But when Boba Fett said, 'as you wish', what he really meant was 'I love you'."

mlfoley , Here.
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    amused amused
K: Smile, K: Personal, K: My Friends Rock, Smile!, K: Sophie

(no subject)

Jostein [is] playing Paris in the play. He does the gayest Paris I've ever seen, and it's Brilliance. Him and Sofie (from grade 12 as well) came over to us after most people had wandered off, him holding her around the waist.

Me (whispering to Tuna): ...Okay, so I take back what I said about him being gay.
Sofie: Hi!
Jostein: We're trying to start an organization: Let the Gay Men Have Girlfriends!
Me (again whispering to Tuna): Aaaand my gaydar's working again.

-- fiere

Kick the baby....

Neil Gaimain's reaction to the Anne Rice Wankage here:

"I think Anne Rice going on Amazon and lambasting her critics was undoubtedly a very brave and satisfying thing for her to do, was every bit as sensible as kicking a tar baby, and, if ever I do something like that, please shoot me.
Have I mentioned I love this man?
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    Tears for Fears - I know this much is true
Our Captain.

(no subject)

From the journal of tick_wonderdog... I had to resist the urge to quote the entire entry, as I was literally in hysterics. It took me ten minutes to calm down fully before I could go to class. (The full entry is here. Also, I cannot do funny html tricks, so you will have to go to the aforementioned entry to see the phonetic explanation of how this guy pronounces Tick's name.)

and he's got to ask me questions all the time. now he's been working just about every wednesday nigt for the past 3 1/2 or 4 years - he already was working there when i started in '01 - he has to ask me how much lettuce to prep for salads. he doesn't ask waterhouse, he never asked bobby (his nephew!) when bobby worked there. but he has to ask me. why? i don't know. i don't freakin' know ow much lettuce we'll need, i been gone 2 1/2 years! "no se! pone la pinche lechuga in su culo! chupa mis nalgas! no chinga conmigo!" and he keeps talking like i'm in another room. something about how waterhouse is a drunk, and last week he ran out of lettuce (he's obsessed with lechuga), and where is la patrona (gaye, the owner), and somthin' somethin' somethin' guapa (must be a waitress), and something about la bruja (patty the lunch cook), OMG, gossip out the ass! and he starts every other sentence with my name - but he doesn't say it, he sings it like a chicken: chaaaaackkk!
he goes on like i was his neighbor in guatemala and speak fluent spanish.
1 semester. spanish 101. so shut up! talk to rachel - she speaks fluent spanish AND portugese.

i feel much better now.
  • Current Music
    Dropkick Murphys - Tenant Enemy #1
pretty sunset
  • pknight

(no subject)

From my friendsfriends page, raindroproses has this to say:

*snicker* I just got a paper for my management class back from the writing assistant. She thinks my writing style is "pretentious".

Well, would she prefer pretension or sarcasm? I can only do one or the other, lady.

Bah. Next time, I'll use sarcasm. That's more fun, anyway.
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    relaxed relaxed

Three for the price of one!

blythely makes a good point:

So I was watching Dogma last night(1)

(1) Yes I have seen it before, but I have not blogged about it. Therefore, in a way, my thoughts do not exist until committed to LJ.

woelfle works in a library:

today I confiscated two half-empty bottles of non-alcoholic beverages hidden very cunningly in a white bag under a table. A bulging, white bag, I ask you. I left a note congratulating the perpetrator on the almost-successful smugglage, and if they want their bottles back, they could come down to the counter for them. Now it remains to be seen if he or she is a coward or thinks "Forget about honour, I want to cash in my deposit."

and disc_sophist is having trouble with the upper classes:

MY comments are posting, but I keep getting this error message:

(104) Connection reset by peer

Dammit, Wellington, stop fucking with my LJ!
britta guns - shelightsupwell

(no subject)

I'm a JELLYFISH! Squidsquidsquissquidsquid! LobSTER. LobSTER. LOBSTERLOBSTERLOBSTER! puffer...FISH. puffer...FISH. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaNENOME. aaaaaaaaaaaaaNENOME. STARfishSTARfishSTARFISHHHHHHHHHHHH! I'm a JELLYFISH... I'm a... JELLYFISH.
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    amused amused
springtime the pony

(no subject)


It feels quite odd, being the bearer of this uncommon knowledge. The sensation is akin to watching TV many years ago and seeing, quite by accident, an episode of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles when Shredder takes off his mask, writes a letter to someone, and then puts the mask back on his head. My young self, like the Buddha, had found Enlightenment at that moment, and would go on to remember that it for the rest of her life.
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    amused amused

We are watching FOX....

From scans_daily, comments on a new series that's being made based off the comic book The Global Frequency

guvnor wrote:
...It's also being made into a TV series, which looks like it's going to be the best thing on television since Whedon left the building. (Of course, it'll be on FOX, which means that no matter how brilliant the writing, acting, or directing, expect it to get canned after only six episodes)

To which agent13 replied:
...which are shown out of order, with the first episode which explains everything finally being shown after the cancellation is announced.

You are watching FOX.....We are watching FOX....
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    Breathe In- Frou Frou
agent may is unimpressed

On sharing your crushes with coworkers

One of my co-workers came running over yesterday to tell me all about this show called "Hetty Wainthrop" she saw... and how "that guy you know" was in the shower in one of the scenes and you could see his "backside." *snicker* Ah yes, Dominic Monaghan's infamous shower scene that I've seen screencaps of on the net for years. It's just funny that my coworkers' first instinct on seeing Dom's ass is to tell me all about it. *snicker*

--twjudy, in a locked post (posted with permission...duh!)
Diary of a Hopeless Romantic

(no subject)

</a></b></a>someblonde_035 :

About two and a half years ago my mom was looking to buy a new car. She said she was looking to buy a Ford. I said "Don't do it." She did. Two and a half years later on a Monday morning when I could have been sleeping in, my mother woke me up and said "My car won't start." I laughed. Then I added, "well, mine will." Apparently, that's not funny to someone when their own car won't start.


(no subject)

From snowy_owlet

In general, I find that conversations go alot easier if I just take care of both sides.

Example #1:
Kitsune: I do not want to go to work today.
Owlet: Gimme the phone!
dial dial the phone
Owlet: Hello, Bossman. This is Owlet.
Bossman: What can I do for you?
Owlet: I need for Kitsune to stay home today. I need the kissing therapy.
Bossman: Well, of course, that is very serious! Plus, I will need to pay him time and a half for providing that important service to you.
Owlet: O!K!

There's more...
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    chipper chipper
Doctor Science

Some definitions are more equal than others

tzikeh was chatting with ladyjaida, and couldn't remember the word for the thing she was thinking of.

</a></b></a>tzikeh: Is it maybe one of those things you crazy kids are doing now where everyone gets together and does something stupid and pointless in a big group and then leaves? What's that called?
</a></b></a>ladyjaida: ... college?
</a></b></a>tzikeh: *dies and is dead*</div>

The actual term her brain was trying to locate: "flash mob".
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    confused your Earth words confuse me