August 21st, 2004

(no subject)

"But I'd like to thank Hitler for the Holocaust.

It's not that I have anything against Jews, it's just that my grandparents met in a Nazi-run work camp. If there hadn't been a holocaust, I wouldn't be here. I think the people of California should thank Hitler, too. If there wasn't a USSR, Arnold wouldn't have left Austria and come here to be a star... And now where would they be? Back with Davis? I don't know. It's a mind-fuck to think about it... It's one of those things that was horrible, but we have to live with... If there was a time machine to go back and change it all, you'd just mess up the present. We'd lose so much."


Why Owlet Is More Het than Gay

from snowy_owlet's journal:

Owlet: I like you.
Girl: Love between women upsets the gyno-oppressive order of the patriarchy.
Owlet: You smell good.
Girl: By admitting our attraction for each other, we step outside the boundaries of acceptibility and into the untamed wilderness of our own choices.
Owlet: Wanna make out?
Girl: *quotes poetry*
Owlet: No, seriously. Wanna make out?
Girl: Physical affection can never fully express the spiritual and intellectual nature of our bond.
Owlet: Is that a no?
Girl: No, that's a yes.
Owlet: WAHOO! Get over here!
Girl: But wait! Before we dive into these uncharted waters, we have to process!
Owlet: No we don't.
Girl: We have to explore the ramifications of these actions on our relationship.
Owlet: No ramifications. Orgasms.
Girl: Will this open inner doors to our darkest emotional pain? Will we devolve into patriarchal power relationships?
Owlet: Orgasms! Orgasms!
Girl: We have been taught that friendships between women are affectionate but remain nonsexual.
Owlet: *whine*
Girl: And in these relationships, does physicality even have a place? Because we are emotionally in sync, does our relationship not transcend the body and enter the realm of the spirit?
Owlet: *cry*
Girl: In exploring the freedom from traditional relationships, we also gain freedom from the expression of those relationships. We can, in effect, construct a new paradigm of our own choosing of how to behave, how to love.
Owlet: zzzzzzzzzz
Girl: In this paradigm, we find the deepest imagery that speaks to our unhealed wounds. We ... Owlet!
Owlet: *snerk* What? I was listening. Paradigms. Yadda yadda.
Girl: I'm ready to make out now.
Owlet: *sigh* I've totally lost my edge.

there're some great comments too, but this is long enough already.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Joe's Crab Shack
  • beehner

(no subject)

I was watching on the TV this program called: "Dying To Be", it's an entertainment show, where people dress up and imitate their favorite singer. So there's a 17 yo girl that sings and looks like the lead singer in a band called "The Jews" (local Rock band). And before she starts singing the host goes: "this girl is mad about the band and the lead singer, she EVEN talks to other fans online". You get that, she EVEN talks online with fans?! I mean, how rad is that? What next, posters on walls? collecting photos of the band?
IF you don't welcome her, maybe the lunatic asylum would...

  • Current Music
    speaking in tongues - eagles of death metal


My sister, glomptackle, on the affects of demanding muses and fanfiction:

my muses have finally gone crazy and suggested a fic idea. (suggested = BAMWRITEMEEEE!11!one) i categorically and grammatically refuse. no. nonononono.

oh. what's the idea, you ask? heh. remember that you asked for this.

hogwarts, oklahoma style. mcgonagall singing "oh the potters and the malfoys should be friends!" in a goofy southern accent. dancing. lots and lots of dancing. and draco all dressed up in breeches.


ok, so the idea wasn't entirely awful. *snicker*
  • Current Mood
K: Hey Stupid!, K: The Unholy Duo, Dogmatix, K: Lesbian Again, K: Laughing Out Loud

It's the "throwing Del Monte" part that kills me...

[NOTE: "the cur" = scurvy *G*]

Things have gotten drastic in my home state - the grocery stores are pushing cantaloupes and peaches as our state delicacies, and I'm thinking, what about the poor beef jerky manufacturers who are gonna lose business by all the people won over to the C side? Their kids have to eat, too! Not to mention this is a semi-arid climate, and growing the C-heavy fruits DAMAGES the ecosystem. I pointed all this out to the grocery store manager, but he just said the beef jerky was in aisle 5. like, this PITIFUL little display not even a tiny fraction the size of the produce section. Which they put at the front of the store just to upset me. I bet they're paid off to say stuff like "If you don't stop yelling and throwing Del Monte, you're going to have to leave." Anyway, before I beaned him with a grapefruit, I detected a bit of pro-cur sympathy in his eyes - and maybe when he recovers from the concussion, he'll be scarred for life from being injured by a grapefruit, and we'll win one more person for the cur.

Bitches. All of 'em.

-- altoidsaddict in pro_scurvy...and if you don't get the joke, try glancing at pro_ana sometime. I take no responsibility for your eyes bleeding. ;)

(no subject)

Whoever claims that cats are refined animals full of poise and grace does not own cats. They own porcelain statues of cats, probably obtained at the Lutheran Gun Club Rummage Sale.

I have owned many cats, more than twenty, and I know the terrible truth. Cats are only pretending. Yes, they were worshipped in Egypt. But the Egyptians, while a fine people, also revered the dung beetle.

The ever-fabulous naamah_darling talks about the cult of the cat in this rib-tickling entry.

Yes, This Sums That Up, Nicely.

(quoted from a locked entry, with permission)

sistrmoon says, "Couldn't the family reunion in your front yard be held off until after 8 am on a Saturday? Not that I don't appreciate the opportunity to work on my Spanish as the words power-drill into my sleepy head...."

Yeah, I've been there and that is exactly what has run through my head a time or two except replace "Spanish" and "words" with "Tejano" and "music," respectively.
  • Current Mood
    nauseated hurting, oh my

(no subject)

Which is more disturbing, the fact that people find my journal by Googling the word 'pussy', or the word 'Geylang'?

Other runners up include - 'Singapore pussy', 'complaint letter about McDonald's', 'Diana Ser', 'nerds', 'Adidas tracksuit' and 'fire hydrant'.

I'm counting down the days till 'David Hasselhoff' shows up.

wrkshy, here.

PS. 'Geylang' is the red-light area of Singapore.

(no subject)

1. And lo, it came to pass that there were many fuckwits in the world who did believe that obscurity and antiquity were equal to quality, and they did cry unto the masses "We are cleverer than you!" And the masses were suitably subdued.

2. Yet there were some who heeded not the call of the fuckwits, and who did have the grace and the intellect to say unto them, You have your priorities backwards.

3. And the fuckwits did reply, UR STOOPID.

Just guess who vivian_shaw is referring to here?
  • amand_r

the ancient ninja way of communicating

So since he survived the hurricane and a week without power, tianyu has been cranky. Today's object of venom? Collapse )

Cut for bad words. Also, I have heard the lady on NPR that he's talking about, and I have repeatedly told him that there is something wrong with his ears. Events leading up to the tirade here.
  • Current Music
    the pillows, "one life"
Shallot Myriad

(no subject)

valerie_z on the joys of being a woman and dealing with insurance companies obviously run by men:

Then I went home and called the insurance company and screamed at them, because they wouldn't pay for my diaphragm, but if I needed it, they'd pay for an abortion. I think I said, "Fine, don't cover it; but can you at least acknowledge the irony?"
blood-spattered bride

Fashion Angst

Why is the Café Press store with the werewolf quote adorned items not selling shirts in black? Homegirl doan wear no white. Does the webmistress/café press store owner not realize the stylings of fandom? People who wear quotes about werewolves are the new millennium Goths. Trust me, I've been collecting werewolf stuff for a long, long time. Rowling released Prisoner of Azkaban and suddenly my kink went mainstream, but do not assault me with your Hello Kitty color range.

  • Current Mood
    amused amused
made by kellirose1313

from kellirose1313,

"Through diapers untold, & toy piles un-numbered, I have fought my way here to the Bedtime beyond the Childrens' Section. To take back the sanity that you have stolen. For my will is as strong as yours, and my crankiness as great...You have no power over me."