July 14th, 2004

Supervillainess Identity -- scans_daily

Feline Terrorism!

kickouttheiambs, inspired by recent events:

Last night we clipped the cat's front claws. Somebody told me to cover the cat's head with a towel, which made it a thousand times easier and also considerably more comical.

Me: Charlie, tell us the connection between Iraq and Al Qaeda!
Charlie: Mew.

The bastard wouldn't cave to torture. Even after we injected him with Truth Serum (tuna flavored Pounce) he just laid on the table with his junk exposed.

And then mlknchz chimes in with this comment:

Ali Hassan Mew has LONG been thought of as the missing link between al-Quaeda and Iraq. Have you turned this info over to the Government?
  • Current Music
    The Smiths - How Soon Is Now
I am a girl of the future

Music and jackin' off

Scene: I am folding towels while listening to a Green Day song.

My brother: "You do know that song is about the guy jacking off, right?"
Me: (after a moment of consideration) "It's a good song. Anyway, name me one band that hasn't written a song about masturbation."
Brother: "Um, the Beatles."
Me: ""Please Please Me". Mutual masturbation."
Brother: "Name another band that has."
Me: "The Rolling Stones, "Satisfaction"."
Brother: "Oh, and Pink Floyd!"
Me: "Pink Floyd never had any songs about masturbation."
Brother: "Pink Floyd is an act of masturbation."

I'm still not sure what he meant by that.

Spider Balls!

From calamityjon, in this post:

And lastly, I walked out to my car this morning, right through a spider-web. I clean the thing off - which probably makes me looks nertz, as it does for everyone who's removing spider-webs from their face - and going along my way when suddenly A SPIDER CRAWLS ACROSS MY GLASSES! CLOSE-UP SPIDER ACTION! I SAW SPIDER BALLS! Probably!
  • Current Mood
    giggling like a nertz
springtime the pony

(no subject)

sorenlundi, in pottersues:

Anything can be a girl's name. I went to school with a girl named Tequilla. (I'm not saying this is a good idea, but I find it slightly better than half the people I know being named either Jason or Michael. At least when I say Tequilla you know I'm talking about Tequilla and not, say, Brandy.)

Are we all on the same page now? Good...

(What? You didn't know Jesus was a Republican? Of course he is. He loves all the little children, so long as they're from two parent homes, don't have sex before marriage, never have abortions, are white, rich, and straight. At least, that's what I've been led to understand from AM radio. Personally? My Jesus could kick Republican Jesus's ass. But he wouldn't. Because he's Jesus, and is above that sort of thing. Like, all holy and stuff. He'd probably just let Republican Jesus beat him up to prove a point, like in that one movie where he DIED. I digress.)

-- insidian rambles afield during a discussion of blood-drive bribery
Halloween Hair

Celebrity Encounters

Dovil talks about meeting James Marsters:

I was just like, wow dude, don't talk to me, I'm going to be beaten up by the groupies if the line doesn't keep moving and I can't hear a word you're saying because you're staring at me with your BLUE EYES OF SCARINESS and I can't hear anything any way. If you want to know why he mentioned that his cast mates flinched when he made eye contact? It's because he STARES and the small gland of your brain is thinking 'threat, threat!' and wanting to show its stomach and pee all over the floor. Pretty eyes, no social skills. But I managed to grimace for the camera and scurry away from the STARING EYES OF DOOM with only a slight odour of pee left behind. Hurrah!

  • Current Mood
    amused amused
  • ysabel

(no subject)

  • Current Mood
    amused amused