March 17th, 2004

hello lion-o

(no subject)

(I joined just to post one of my all time favorite LJ quotes. From elhoserboy)

New Year.

I immediately went home and consulted my Mary-Kate Ashley Olson calendar. After careful scrutiny, I realized that it was, in fact, a calendar. Upon even closer inspection, I discovered that it was already February 2004!

The entire journal follows suit. :)
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Snark

The Joy of Roommates

"Dear suitemates. Had I know that you were in such dire need of tampons and that you couldn't afford your own, I would have bought an extra box. But alas I did not. Now I'm bleeding and tamponless. So, in the meantime, I have reverted to the olden days and using rags. If you're missing any socks, you'll know where they've gone to. Love, Emily"

-- from a locked post by wm_law2003, used with permission
  • Current Music
    "Love Match" - Paul Kennerley - Misery With A Beat
Whuh Huh?!

(no subject)

so...meeting in 15 min.... i wonder what would happen if i took my bagel and schmear, plastered it to my boobs and called myself shirley?

eh, they'd prolly just get confused and claim i surely wasn't shirley cause the surly shirley who surely is shirley bears no resemblence to me with bagel and schmear plastered to my boobs.

-- sarcasticchick, who is apparently losing her mind by degrees ;)



You know how a fic which is 100 words long is called a drabble? I'd like to make up a similar word to describe what happens when I attempt to write something which makes sense only in my head and turns out absolutely awful when I go to translate it onto paper. I'm leaning towards dribble, scribble, scrabble, or oh bollocks, mary's written more wanky self-indulgent tripe.

-- sharpest_rose
Self - Pinup

(no subject)

"I wrote this song to the guy who knocked on my window last night, who I am going to murder:

Row, row, row your boat
To the depths of hell
Heathenly, heathenly, heathenly, heathenly
Life did not end well.

It is a round. He and all his shithead friends can sing it while they plunge into eternal damnation"

From hyperform. More people should express their hatred in original song.
  • Current Mood
    musical
A scribe is I

(no subject)

From nder's recent post to customers_suck about the stunning stupidity of callers to his Tier 2 customer support line.

-You've not an invertebrate. Use said spine to tell people bad news, or outright NO when it's necessary. I promise they won't fly overseas and beat you. Though I may, if pushed.
  • Current Music
    Wide Right Turns - On a Train
default

Happy St Paddy's Day?

(Of course, what's funny about the whole thing is that my mother is part-Irish, but she was Lutheran before she converted to Catholicism to marry my father. My dad is Catholic, but he's Brit/Scot Catholic. It's small wonder that if I had to choose sides in the North Ireland conflict, I'd just grab a big stick and beat the crap out of myself. Either that, or yell "Dogpile on the American!")

-- sclerotic_rings, on The Wearin' of the Green.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
dancing indigo

Who Knew St. Pat's would give such good metaquotes fodder?!

"Yes, that’s right; I’m Irish and I dislike beer. I am aware that this is possibly enough to get me kicked out of the nationality, stereotypical although that statement is -- I have relatives that don’t drink _much_, but as far as I’m aware, I’m the only one in the family who actually doesn’t drink at _all_.*

...

(*This is not an accurate statement: I _do_ drink. I drink girlie drinks. I drink Long Island Iced Teas. When taken to the Outback Steakhouse, I drink enormous peach-flavoured drinks called ‘Wallaby Darneds’ and talk about ear-lobsters and pornographic mermaids and make humourously drunken calls to my significant other’s answering machine. But I don’t drink beer. It’s just the way that the world works, and as long as people keep buying me drinks in colours that wouldn’t look out of place on a My Little Pony, I’m happy with it.

For the sake of being thorough, I must add that even when I _am_ genuinely drunk, I don’t see leprechauns. My relatively rare drinking binges have thus far remained completely leprechaun-free.)
"

--cadhla ruminating on St. Patrick's day, the traditions thereof, and on being Irish but generally not believed to be so despite the blonde hair and blue eyes, in this A Phouka Walks Into A Bar column on her LJ. Do read the whole thing.



cadhla's disclaimer which allows me to post it here:

'A Phouka Walks Into A Bar' is a non-commercial humor column, written and distributed for entertainment purposes only. If you feel that you have been added to this list in error, please email Seanan McGuire at delirium@xocolatl.com, and you will be removed. The contents of this column are © Seanan McGuire, 2004, and may not be forwarded or distributed in any form without this notice. Has anybody seen my shoes recently?
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Book of Mormon - spooky Mormon hell drea

(no subject)

How do you know it wasn't Adam and Steve. Adam just wanted a companion right? God could have made Adam and Steve, then decided to start prototyping women. On that note, it could've just as well have been Eve and Elane. What about Derrek? This was so long ago after all, maybe Adam and Eve just got the book deal first.

garneldo, here, in gaystr8alliance
Fu...dge.

(no subject)

You know what would be really funny? If the Seton Hall Pirates played the Vanderbilt Commodores. Because I definitely have this great mental image of Jack Sparrow and Commodore Norrington trying to play basketball. Norrington would make a jump shot and his hat would come off; Sparrow would nance around the court and cheat a lot. Of course, Elizabeth would be a cheerleader; Will would be a referee; and the monkey could sell concessions!

- lisaofdoom