March 9th, 2004

Dustpan

He's so great.

So, backfromspace saw Mama Mia the other day...

Okay, one lady did that. We were in the balcony, easily 2/3 of a maybe half-filled house (there was a cast substitution for the guy playing the sweaty daterape guy priest and we blamed him), and there was just the one lady. "She obviously saw the commercial," I said. "Why? Why must they wear codpieces?" Charlotte answered. "Whyyy?"

Gotta read the whole thing

EDIT: HTML retardedness...
  • Current Music
    "This Love," Maroon 5
humor

I find myself doing this too..

i'm going to a recourse meeting in ten minutes to be told why i didn't get the job i applied for. i'd rather go get a root canal. why the hell did i request this? well i know why. best thing to do so i don't repeat my mistakes, blah blah. sometimes i mistake myself for someone who actually cares. --mcee
  • Current Mood
    rushed rushed
bednite snacks
  • snacky

Long, but so worth it...

Over on fandom_wank, wankprophet is a little tired of Harry Potter fans' complaints about J.K. Rowling, but realizes it's just part of the history of fandom:


Holy Christ, will somebody please tell me this isn't for real?!? Just throw me a bone, a sliver, anything. I'm sitting here reading this and wonder why the fuck do they even read JKR's books? Call me crazy, but if I read a book and my reaction was "She can't write, she has no grasp of characterization, she clearly needs to get her priorities straight and I can think of a splooging drama queen on the Internet that I would much prefer to read", I wouldn't even be reading the remaining books in the series, much less be going out and joining an effing fandom. These are very sad people, and by "sad", I mean "dumb and should be cast into the outer darkness just to prevent the contamination of our world with their own perverse brand of pandemic irrationality posing as squeeing fangirly lust for anything that allows them to fantasize that someone would be redeemed by them rather than flay them and leave their skin nailed to their foyer wall as a warning to any other totally unappealing fangirls not to so much as squeal in the presence of the aforementioned flayer of fangirls."

"Sad" condenses that definition nicely, dontchathink?

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  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Peachy//wicked_visions

It IS possible to starve to death...

i still feel gross and blargh. i didn't eat much, because my stomach decided all food was the spawn of the devil.

read: "BACK YOU, SILLY EENGLEESH MOOFEENS! M-MOOOFENS"

so i slept it off. and now my stomach demands that IT WANTS A BURGER NOW. A LARGE, FATTENING CHEESEBURGER WITH EVERYTHING ON IT INCLUDING A THICK COATING OF MAYONNAISE. but my tongue refuses to agree to tomatoes.

so i wait an hour. and my stomach says, "IF YOU DON'T GET ME THIS BURGER, I'M GOING TO STAGE A COUP. NOWWWWWW."

and since i do not need la revolution de la jessi, i think i shall give in to this bastard stomach of mine.


this continues in a conversation between myself and her...

laizeohbeets:i'm suddenly picturing all of these silly french people no bigger than tin soldiers pounding my stomach
laizeohbeets:"WE WANT ZIS BREAD TO EAT! ONLY A LEETLE BEET OF BREAD!"
laizeohbeets: so my mind says, "let them eat cake!"
laizeohbeets:the problem being.. i don't HAVE any cake.

--laizeohbeets: from a locked post, with permission, and an in-progress IM convo.
  • Current Music
    Depeche Mode- "Policy of Truth"

Kids are great!

From anniesj:

One of the girls who works in another company in our office complex was telling us about her ten-year-old daughter, Kait. The other night, they were having dinner when a tampon commercial came on.

KAIT: Mom, how do you pee when you have a tampon in?
KAIT'S MOM: Well, hon, you put it in a different hole.
KAIT: Oh. (pause, then horrified look) Oh my God, Mom! Then how do you POOP?
I love the world (xkcd)

(no subject)

"I used to be convinced that my cats, while not the Nobel Prize winners of the feline world, were at least of average intelligence. I mean, they do remember to breathe regularly. They even remember what time it is I should feed them. (And that time is NOW. doesn't matter if I fed them five minutes ago, it's still NOW!) And, occasionally, with a lot of work, I could beat something into them, so they finally gave a reasonable facsimile of 'learning.' Such as, 'Biting at live electrical wires means you either get a blast of cold water all over you, or if that's not handy, you'll hear an earsplitting high noise as Mommy shrieks at the top of her lungs. Both are unpleasant, but much better than doing a fast little polka with your hair on fire.'"

--darqstar, in this post. Read the entire thing--it's hilarious.

(no subject)

JoAnn's had a remnant of wonderfully hideous orange fur, so I am making a large stuffed broken carrot. I have had the following conversation with five people:

"What'cha making?"

"Stuffed carrot."

(silence)

-annlarimer
POTC - Captain Jack - Pirate

And hast thou slain the Paperwork?

chevalier2 and queeniefox had some fun mixing Lewis Carroll and the spell checker...

Emma says:I spellhecked jabberwocky yestreday
I must go to the botanical gardens says:oh dear
I must go to the botanical gardens says:by the way on the list of 'best random changes of subject ever' that has to be near the top
Emma says:
‘Two rolling, and the pithy tomes did gyre and wimble in the woe; All imps were the boogies, and the more wraths bugrake. “Beware the lacework, my son!
I must go to the botanical gardens says:
*falls of chair laughing*
I must go to the botanical gardens says:
FEAR THE DOILIES!
Emma says:
O crablouse day! Callboy! Cellos!”
I must go to the botanical gardens says:
*splutters*
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--queeniefox, right here.
trixie on the cot

it's been at least a day since the last tPotC related quote, right?

I downloaded and watched the jesus chainsaw massacre. for all the fuss and the drama associated with this movie, it's not even that good. I must say however, that it was best that I did not see this in the theater -- possible headline would be "damn dirty dyke heathen stoned to death for heckling the passion". When the romans were wailing into him, all i could say was "Jesus, USE YOUR SAFE WORD!"

-- publicbeta

(no subject)

Valerie: Why didn't you go to the doctor?
Mike: It's not that bad.
Valerie: If you still feel this way tomorrow, go to the doctor.
Mike: Maybe.
Valerie: Yes, you will.
Mike: We'll see.
Valerie: If you're still sick tomorrow, and you don't go to the doctor, I'm going to beat the crap out of you and break your nose, and then you really will have to go to a doctor.


--valerie_z in a locked post, qouted with permission.
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    bouncy bouncy
In My Heart I Did No Crime

On going there.

"Yeah, I went "there". "There" is a tequila bar, in the gutter, in Guam, past the cactus on your left. My roommates and I have barstools with our names on them, and every night we do body shots off of Viggo Mortensen.

Make it a double."

-belladonnalea, whose mind goes to a dirty dirty place all the time. I know this because I go with her.
  • Current Music
    LotR soundtrack.