Metaquotes

So I go into the bathroom to take a whiz and I drop my knickers and a moth flies out. And you thought YOU had strange things in your pants.

- mob_psychology

zidane:

Overheard in Bookshop Santa Cruz:
:Man sits down on bench, with a photography book:
Man: Here, KITTY KITTY KITTY! *makes puma sounds. repeatedly.*
Man: Whoa there, lookit that cat! I LIKE KITTIES! *growls again.*

Quoted on ladybirdsleeps' HellJay, so I credit her for finding it:

"I thought about building you a boat to survive the river of tears I'm crying for you even as we speak, but the world's smallest violins just aren't a reliable source of lumber and that cross you're nailing yourself to seems like it'd be bouyant enough anyway."
-backfromspace, here

-Callisto

Stolen form Ysidro ...who should be severely punished.

* systahQ starts singing that devinyls song...
'i don't want/uruk-hai or elves/when i think of hobbits, i touch myself...'

2. Bill Murray for Best Actor
7. Johnny Depp for Best Actor

If we can't have both, could we have Johnny Depp for Best Pirate? He'd get that no problem! Except for Jason Isacs, he could have Best Supporting Pirate (because that croc was obviously the star). =D

-- myniamh

I blame Ben Franklin and his "early to bed, early to rise" propaganda. We're a country founded by a bunch of goddam morning people! You know why? The sensible folk were still in bed when they had their clandestine, pre-dawn meetings! Bastards! The lot of 'em!

--lunaris_

While discussing a disgusting little bigot:

phosfate: People like her make me want to miscegenate early and often.

smo: I'll tell her that both my brother and sister are dating persons of color. Hotcha.

rann: If one of your siblings was dating a Jewish person of color of the same gender, it just might make her head explode. n.n

smo: Note to self: hook sister up with Ethiopian drag king.

When I couldn't remember, in a recent post, the names of the territories resulting from the partition of Canada's Northwest Territory, Hamilton's own etherlad came to my rescue:

Northwest Territories got split into the Northwest Territories (the western half) and Nunavut.

There was a lot of discussion over that - if they were calling one half Nunavut, what were they going to call the other half? My favorite choices were "Alluvut" or "The Restuvut."

But they stuck with NWT. Oh, well. (:

You know what's great? How pubic hair is, just after a bath or shower. The hairs are nice and fluffy and clean, not all mashed down like they get after you wear underpants all day. It is a cheerful crotch-poof of joy.

BE FREE, PUBES!

--lokabrenna

Eowyn and Gandalf fight an unusual foe.

The Doom Beast says:

for the record, this is NOT how it really went down.
in the end, i ate them both.
seriously.
well, i got a shoe, anyway. and part of a scabbard.
the idiot human took them away from me after that.

Excerpts from an entry about fandom_scruples by alara_r:

However, I gotta point out that no one is proposing password protection for the things *I* want to protect my kids from.

I think reading tons of badfics would be bad for kids, by modeling a writing behavior which should *not* be repeated and by failing to reinforce good spelling, grammar and formatting. So *I*, personally, would rather my kids read a ton of well-written NC-17 slashfics and hetfics about loving exclusive relationships than a single PG-rated badfic het romance that destroys the female character and also has no paragraphs.

Read the whole thing here.

Overheard on nostalgia_lj's journal:

"I support the various space programmes, mainly cos space is teh kewl. And I did automatically assume that Dubyah personally was going into space. Strap him to several-many tons of fuel and point him at the moon? Has my full support, yo."

The reason why 'plot bunny' is actually a tremendously appropriate metaphor

boojum: "Trying to determine which horrific assumption in the canned response should make my head explode first makes my head explode." (from here, a discussion on the attitudes of those people who seem to think they need to be married and all men are swine.)

"Dear Eyebrows,

I hate you. No really, I do. No matter how often I pluck and tweeze you into a pair of svelty and curvy lines of hair, you continue to grow back into bushman eyebrows the likes of which have not been seen since the days when dinosaurs ruled the earth.

Please cease and desist from causing me so much pain and torment, or I will shave you off and pencil you in with some brown kohl.

Love,
Me."

--superforeigner

Have tiled Sean Bean's naked back and cutely dimpled ass as my background. Am v. happy. Have noticed it does not turn me on as aesthetically pleasing as it is and as much as I would totally feel it up. Am def. lesbian.

~calichan

So I'm reading this argument against GM crops over here in Little Britain, and some granola-crunching hippie who probably lives on rectum-paralysing medication to stop them constantly fountaining a stream of seed-riddled diarrhoea makes what they think is a point. Now, this person's brain is clouded by malnutrition and leaf mould, so maybe I should cut them some slack. But, frankly, these branch-gnawing Archaic Revival fuckwits have a life expectancy of about forty-five, they don't have to live through the world they're trying to visit upon the rest of us, and they should be swatted like the mayflies in bicycle clips they are.

diepunyhumans

reddog_san: (1) No member of the club shall become an officer who has spent more than ten (10) days in the Ninth Circle of Hell.
reddog_san: (2) The president must attain a 3/4 majority vote of attending club members in order to remove his pants.
reddog_san: I'm helping, whee!
shmitz: actually
shmitz: I wish we had that second one in there

--from shmitz's journal, here.

From thessalian :

The Shreddies adverts lie.

They say that their product "keeps hunger locked up 'til lunch". Bollocks. I scoffed down a bowl of chocolate Shreddies at 6:30 this morning and was ready to eat my own socks by 8:30. Even a packet of Hula Hoops couldn't kill the hunger and by the time lunchtime rolled around, I had strongly considered the 'long pig' option. Then again, I wouldn't want to kill someone I liked for food, Kate's far too stringy and Julie probably tastes nasty anyway.

Remember when horses were better than boys?? Well, they still are!

-- greenbriar

[note to self]
When you have miles to go before you sleep and miles to go before you sleep? Go the miles. Do not argue with me. Go. The. Damn. Miles. Because if you sleep before you've gone the miles then do you know what you've just done?
That's right. You have fallen asleep in the snow.
And do you know what that means?
You do? Amazing. Good self! Biscuit! It means you're dead!
[/note to self]
--schiarire