December 20th, 2003


wicked_wish posts perhaps the most breathless movie review ever

we just got back from The Return of the King.

sweet furry baby jesus, stuffed in a tortilla, jumping up and down on a pogo stick while the pigs fly by and the cows stop for directions. i mean, dear curly virgin mary, cramming weasels into socks, pulling olives out of a jar and sucking on the pits. and for that matter...oh holy apostles, mad with caviar and wondering where the monkeys went. and while we're at it--great heavenly hosts, singing songs about the southland, playing putt-putt and asking for Snoopy band-aids...and i'd better quit there.

Thinking of others...good call

I wsa reading this wedding stuff on MSN for some odd reason, and I clicked on the "Wedding night necessities" link, and it has all these things for sale to make your wedding night special...a bed of roses, lingerie, the Kama Sutra....and Valtrex.


Well, I guess your wedding night would be better if your husband/wife knew you were putting forth the effort to keep your herpes under control.

  • Current Mood
    snickering into my tea

This does not actually contain spoilers, hush.

Having seen ROTK* I shall make a spoiler post. There shall be no silly "lj-cut" because if you have not read the book and know these FIFTY YEAR OLD plotpoints, you are obviously lesser than me. Oh so lesser. Even if you probably had better things to do than read this stuff.


  • The opening sequences were a bit distressing, especially where Gandalf sold Pippin and Merry off to support his pipe weed habit.

  • Legolas' crushing by oliphaunt was tragic, but at least it paved the way for Gimli to become the prettiest (something I am glad Pj focused on. I mean, more Frodo and Sam instead of focusing on the more important characters like Gimli and Arwen would have been unforgiveable)

  • Eowyn tearing off her mask to reveal she is Arwen.

  • Denethor and Faramir's big group hug where he tells Faramir's adopted and Faramir's real name is Eobob. "Son, you may have wondered why you're a blond gondorian..." is one of those additions I felt wasn't so bad. Although the leaving out of the piking scene was terrible.

  • the battle ending when the orcs suddenly unionize.

  • Frodo and Sauron talking out their differences over some tea and discovering a mutual love of poking Sam with a sharp stick.

  • The ending was a bit sad, with the whole being smited by god for being a bunch of pagan heathens and all but the music was nice.

The end. They all lived happily ever except for the being smited to death thing.

*not really

  • Current Mood
so cute and yummy


I wish I had a brand of cool. Unfortunately, my cool is more like an off-brand of cool. You know, like when you go to the Dollar Store and buy a snack, but then you look at the bag and you're like, "Wait a minute, what the hell are "Nacho 'Cheese' Noritos"?"
-an entire entry from thewriter0
  • erlking

(no subject)

From beeena's hilarious year-end survey.

"3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
my cousin did. i saw the baby today. gross!

i'd eat babies for dinner. if i could!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
if a baby is digested, does it die?

(ie - no. dying is so 90s)

The entire entry (and her journal as a whole) I find really hilarious.