October 22nd, 2003

Paging Mr. Darcy!

capote gets all Jane Austen on us:

"It's a truth universally acknowledged that a single late twenty-something charity worker in possession of paltry salary, most of which is swallowed up by credit card repayments, cab fares, long overdue student loans and criminally overpriced bottles of Pinot Grigio, hasn't a hope in hell's chance of getting a mortgage."
tree

On Hockey:

satyr69 and his friend are upset about how poorly the San Jose Sharks are playing, so they have decided to write a letter to the team. Quote:

The gist of the letter will be as forth:
We have a game plan for you after watching Tuesday nights game: Quit Sucking So Much! We're two gay boys and we don't suck as much as you guys do.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
springtime the pony

(no subject)

I happened across this while flipping through the pottersues archives. I don't think it's been posted here.

The Sue of the Day for June 22nd was 'Arwen Malfoy'. Yes, that's right.

dawndragon: She needs to have a hot and angst-filled forbidden romance now with Harry's long lost twin - Aragorn Potter.
sir_hellsing: *BUT* She will have to face her rival the super-genius muggle-born witch Eowyn Granger (who is really Hermione's younger sister who was in USA and can beat the crap out of Dementor with her magical shield!). Later, she will forget about Aragorn and have a impossible love (TM) with Faramir Snape, Prof Severus Snape's youngest son. Wait until Dumbledore reveals his identity as an Istari and the special appearance of the new heir of Slytherin: Sauron Morgoth Riddle.
wal_lace: Albus the Blue?
sir_hellsing: The Purple or the Magenta most likely... Since they are already two blue Istari (Pallando and Alatar)
wal_lace: Albus the Urple, then. Has to be.
K: Hey Stupid!, K: The Unholy Duo, Dogmatix, K: Lesbian Again, K: Laughing Out Loud

(no subject)

Okay, I've been in the office since about 8:30 a.m. and have barely worked. Instead, I've been doing something important - decorating my container of raisins.

Hear me out.

I like raisins. So I bought one of those containers. I sat it down on my desk, but it was annoying me. That stupid sunbonneted girl just grinning at me like, "You bought raisins? Nobody likes raisins! I'm on the stupid container and I don't like raisins!"

She had to go.

Some constructive time on Google and some tape and scissors later, I now have a decorative Gamera container with his turtleness and a message on the back stating, "Gamera demands your instant death...and raisins!"

Gamera likes raisins. Gamera is my friend.

-- mice
  • rivv

(no subject)

mutha_mae_i69 says:
Finally, the tow truck gets there. Of course its your typical tow truck driver. He was skinny with a scraggly beard. He had a confederate flag doo rag on and no teeth. His redneck lady friend was in the truck waiting for him. She kept giving me dirty looks as if I was checking out her man. Yes, I'm looking for a man with no teeth who is good with his hands. Ugh.

Too good for an inveterate car-hater like myself not to share:

To the moron in the SUV, Virginia license plate WWJD 03:

You know, I don't know what J would do, but I can tell you what he wouldn't. He wouldn't swing wide when he makes his right turn so that he ends up in the left lane, blocking me as I make a left turn into that very same lane. And then he wouldn't stand on his brakes for no good reason as soon as he makes the turn, causing me to come to a screeching halt just barely clear of the intersection behind me.

Yo, you take driving lessons from the Holy Ghost and you'll be a safe, courteous driver, too.

-- ladyvyola
void

(no subject)

Bad day to be xcorvis

Tech support is like sex. If they talk too much, they ruin the experience, and if you tell them to shut up, you get in trouble. So you just have to try to ignore what they're saying and keep going.

Mood: not as bitter as it seems

Edit: 50 minutes later, I am more bitter than it seems. Fucking old geezer should bother his grandkids with his immensely boring continuously-talking presence, not me.
dropbear

(no subject)

Every fandom mocks their source material. From love, of course.

Anastasia on Justin Timberlake's TRL appearance (I think):

You know, I think it's really important that couples not keep anything from each other, so it's really reassuring that Cameron isn't bogarting her coke stash.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
merchgirl
  • divabat

(no subject)

sunhawk talking about Fred Phelps :

God hates fags? I think he means HE hates fags. i mean, writing Mary Sues are one thing, but when you Self-Insert yourself into your own religion as the holy figure? That's just bizarre and silly.
Bobinet, Hungarian theatre, La Vie Parisienne, Párizsi élet

Stargate action figures

"Also, I want my own little SG-1 team for Christmas. Or, failing that, posable action figures. Formidable Glare Janet, complete with class B uniform and hypodermic needle, rubber gloves sold seperately. 'Determined Look' Hammond. Action Teal'c with Moveable Eyebrow. I am, unfortunately, having no luck finding these items"
-truestories