October 15th, 2003

suncatcher

Opera

"Opera," says the student, "is when you stab a person, instead of bleeding, the person sings." Wonderful concept, but then the student doesn't stop there, instead improvises: "Your Aegis [band] however, is when a person receives multiple stab wounds and refuses to die, but sings and sings and sings!"

I'm sure he didn't mean it as a compliment.

-- From hipaolo
Logic error

"Light me..."

"The Chinese assert that they were actually first to try to send a man into space. A 16th-century Ming Dynasty artisan, Wan Hu, held kites in each hand and strapped himself to a chair equipped with rockets, according to some historical accounts carried in the state news media.

His servants reportedly lit the gunpowder-fueled rocket as Mr. Wan tried to launch himself into the sky. He failed, dying in the explosion."

-posted by glorioushope in mock_the_stupid.

Read the rest of the comments too, as they're just as priceless.
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    silly silly
Random - Park bench

0_o

Witnessed by Pete, while on the London Eye, this past summer.
[Condensation/dew drops roll down glass of compartment. Twelve year-old boy speaks to his mother.]
BOY: Look, mum! It's raining!
[Boy realizes the stupidity of his statement. Casually tries to write it off.]
BOY: It's raining...men. [more casually]...Hallelujah.


From the journal of gutlesswonder
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    amused amused
danika

(no subject)

Gir, Zim, and Gaz are all of saturnineutopia's kitties, and Gaz is the newest addition.

"Gir's beside himself. I took Zim to work and came home with Gaz. He keeps looking at Gaz like maybe it's Zim, but with a dye job. He's terribly confused."
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    amused amused
road

A couple of dinky-di quotes for you. :)

Both found on aussielj

I just thought I would share with you the joys of living in true rural Australia, where all creatures are safe and happy to share my space. {now if only the brown snakes and giant wolf spiders would go some place else!}

hjj Read the whole story (about echidnas) is here.

***

And a brush with fame...

I then drove 5 minutes to the reptile park with said bundle in the boot of my car, got out of the car and went into the reptile park so someone could retrive snake. So, this fellow comes out, kinda looking at me funny and requests that I bring the snake inside. After retrieving said snake in pillow case in box in doona cover from the boot of my car I re-entered the establishment holding the whole kit and kaboodle at arms length and dumped it on the counter.

Picture, if you will, the look of complete bafflement I got about being so scared of snakes. There were numerous more baffled and disbelieving looks passed my way as the fellow opened up my packaging. By the time he got to the snake, he actually thought I was a complete drongo. So he pulls this snake out of the pillow case and went into raptures about it. Apparently, it was a small-eyed snake (not too poisonous), gravid (pregnant), and 'it was a beudy'. I was then asked, as said fellow played with this snake, where it came from. Being quick witted, I gave an address at the opposite side of Beerwah as the snake slithered around being held onto by ... have you guessed yet?

Beerwah Reptile Park is now Australia Zoo.

Steve Irwin thought I was an idiot.


From alasenr The whole post can be found here - it's a quite cute story.
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    amused amused
one - original (doctor who)

An AIM discussion about modern day Bond theme songs becomes quite amusing.

DonnaCSoprano: Garbage's theme for the Bond film before that was kick ass.
Varyar: I can't even remember it.
DonnaCSoprano: The World Is Not Enough.
Varyar: I only saw that - um, never, actually. Or parts of it, but not the theme.
DonnaCSoprano: I thought the movie was crap but the theme song was good.
Varyar: I can't bring myself to watch a movie, even a Bond movie, that has Denise Richards as a nuclear scientist.

*Taken from the Journal of varyar with permission.
  • Current Music
    "Die Another Day" - Madonna