October 10th, 2003

goddess

Adventures in Iceland...

Ahhh...the joys of airplane travel and the detours that sometimes accompany them.

P.S. when i promised profanity to be an inherent part of this experience, it was apparently prophetic.

p.p.s. I'm in fucking Iceland! In what universe is this ok?!


~ doqx
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Faded

Silence of the Lambs - a musical.

posted in sea_gaagii's journal:

Silence of the Lambs: The Musical

If I Could Smell Her Cunt
- Dr. Lecter
[Lecter]
(spoken)
Now.
What did Miggs say to you?
Multiple Miggs in the next cell, he
Hissed at you.
What did he say?

[Clarice]
He said,
"I can smell your cunt."

[Lecter]
I see.
I myself cannot.

(sung)
If I could smell her cunt
She'd help me taste humanity again
And if I promise not to eat her
Then perhaps she'd even be my friend
If I could smell her cunt
If I could smell her cunt.
  • Current Mood
    ditzy this was too funny!
domino--by chuchan

(no subject)

evilwildlex posted this here.

Dealt with a pair of morons today at Blockbuster.

Now, I was expecting them to be somewhat moronic right as soon as one of them shouted in our nice and peaceful store "IT'S SO -QUIET- IN HERE!!!" My AM, Branko, makes a little face out of their sight, and our shift leader, Alex, mumbles "Not anymore" before deciding to retaliate by utterly cranking the volume on all the tvs for a few seconds, until she realized that was exactly what the idjits WANTED, and put it back to a normal level.

The two women processed oxygen into carbon dioxide elsewhere in the store until they came up to the front with What a Girl Wants and a chick flick whose name I forgot. They could not decide between the two, and wanted my opinion. Apparently, being female automatically makes me a conoisseur of chick flicks. I had not seen either movie, so they declared that I sucked, and asked Alex's opinion. SHE hadn't seen them either, and so they asked Branko, who also hadn't seen them.

They turned back to me, and asked what I had to reccomend. I listed off some of the movies I thought could fall under the category of "chick flick" but I had actually enjoyed: Miss Congeniality, How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days, and Two Weeks Notice. They'd seen them all and enjoyed them, but then acted annoyed with me for suggesting movies other than the two they had in hand.

"The issue at hand is these movies! What is your opinion?" As I pondered what it was about -haven't seen them before- that they didn't understand, Branko reccomended the one whose name I can't remember, as they were obviously not teen girls (I think teen girls would have been more mature).

Throughout the conversation, they made a big loud deal over the fact that they were having a girls' night. Okay, it was fine the first time they mentioned it, they wanted to have a good chick flick for their girls' night in. But they kept repeating it ad nauseum, and acting as though the movie was exceptionally important. They'd frequently throw in comments like "HELLO! GIRLS' NIGHT! Look at us! We're dressed down and everything! We need a good movie and we need an opinion!"

Then when the louder of the pair was paying for the movie, she passed her debit card over the sensormatic thing as she was handing it to me, then proceeded to go into a bitch fit over that.

"Did you de-activate my debit card?! You'd better not have! I'll be really mad if you did! If you broke it, you owe me a free movie!" Luckily, the 'crisis' was averted by the card working just fine, and we sent them on their merry vacous way.


Having worked in a video store, I feel her pain.
  • Current Music
    Everything You Want
void

In a post entitled "S & R Cat Food Update"


splattworld writes:

Siegfried of Siegfried and Roy appeared on Good Morning America today, explaining that the tiger that mauled Roy, his partner, was just trying to help.

"A cat is a tiger," he said, "and when he wants to protect his pal he does it the way a tiger does, with his strength."

Uncomfirmed reports from a Las Vegas ICU indicated that upon hearing this, an identified patient went berzerk, flailing wildly, ripping out several IVs, and incoherently screaming something muffled by ventilation tubes. Though whatever the patient tried to say was garbled, several on-duty nurses believed it was something like: "Are you high? He tried to eat my motherfucking ass!"

The patient was sedated shortly afterward and sank into a twitching, fitful sleep.