August 10th, 2003

jenny linsky

I would not be at all surprised.

"makes you wonder if arnold schwarzenegger really is a time-traveling cyborg. one who foresaw the current problems in california, and went back to specifically make movies called The Running Man and Total Recall, just so the media could constantly reference them in lame puns, driving everyone in the state insane, making them complacent and easy to manipulate, therefore voting for him. if on election night, after he's won, arnold gets up on the podium and takes a knife and, cutting around his elbow, removes the skin to reveal a robot hand, don't come crying to me."

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Overkill? Nah..

From ajhalluk

A lead news story in the Mail was that apparently Prince William, second in line to the throne of this rapidly decaying land, while on holiday in Kenya has stalked and killed a fourteen inches tall antelope called a dik-dik using traditional Masai hunting methods.

Ignoring the Pythonesque overkill inherent in attacking something approximately the size of a Jack Russell with a seven foot spear, to say nothing of the whole Freudian aspect of the thing, my favorite part of the story was the explanation that Prince William had honed his hunting skills by creeping up on trees.

Holy batshit, but whatever one thinks about the Royal Family, breeding for brains is clearly not what they've been doing over the last few hundred years.
[jaws] 'help! shark!'
  • _audrey

(no subject)

This HAS to be a hoax. I mean it absolutely HAS to be, I am just not convinced. It is WAAY too fake. I don't mean the pictures, they look just fine. But there is no way humans could continue to survive on this planet if they were truly as stupid as the people quoted in the articles. They have photos of what are obviously supposed to be Pterydactals and Plesiasaurs and then have the people saying "Well, we found this long-necked turtle." and "This sparrow had funny pointed wings, but it could fly all right, so I thought nothing of it." I mean, the average four-year old can recognize a damn Plesiasaur!

"We saw this funny lizard out by the barn. It came outta a smoulderin' hole in the ground and set our crops on fire with it's breath. Then it ate my son Jethro, and two of our cows. It was a talkin' lizard, too. The lizard said it had 'ass-ended upon us with the wraith of the ages, to devour the souls of us and our kin.' I thought it was kinda wierd, but Ma said we get geckos in the fields sometimes, so I didn't put much thought into it."

-shadowcircus, discussing this post in cryptozoology.
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Tea! Penguin! (doyle on JF), penguin say tea?

How 'bout a loving bugger?

Something that is likely to stop me dead in my tracks when reading a story: the phrase "poignant fuck."

Are fucks ever poignant? Fuck is such a short, emphatic word, so much so, that I think that "poignant" which is delicate and sensitive, would feel uncomfortable in fuck's presence. Reluctant to even stay in the same sentence as fuck, or even the same paragraph. I can see poignant sidling as far away as possible, in fear of it's nice clean clothes.

Fuck of course, would be just as unlikely to want to be seen with "poignant." It's a big, bluff crude sort of word, who would find being paired with such a high class word an embarrassment.

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