Also, WMU Freshmen, welcome! The majority of you are inconsiderate assholes who can't drive!
To aid those of us who may not fully understand the nature of what we must deal with for the next few days/weeks, I've developed a few mathematic equations to explain certain common behaviors.
1. freshman boy+bad driving+loud music = smallest penis in the world
2. freshman girl+mini skirt+high-heeled flip flops = self-exploitation that will last until she realizes she has to walk to class, whereupon she will come in her pajamas.
3. pedestrian+no crosswalk+my car = smushed pedestrian
4. small penis+self-exploited girl = campus-wide herpes epidemic
I love this time of year.