Tiara (divabat) wrote in metaquotes,

From this entry in mock_the_stupid, where snowfox090 argues with some fundameltalists over their protests on who God hates :

snowfox090 : (part of original post)

ME: So, God hates all these people?
FUNDIE: And more! God hates anyone who doesn't keep His laws!
ME: Tell me something. Can you fully understand God?
FUNDIE: No. I'm human. Humans can't comprehend God's perfection!
ME: Okay. So you can't really claim to know everything God thinks or does?
FUNDIE: Well, no...
ME: Then how do you know he hates them?
FUNDIE: *pause* I don't have to know how my truck works to ride down the highway in it!
ME: So... you're comparing the Almighty God to a truck. *long pause* So does the Lord have cup holders?

Apparantly God does not have cup holders.

rubyfire : FUNDIE: *pause* I don't have to know how my truck works to ride down the highway in it!

What? You ride God down the highway, too?

I wonder if God comes with a leather interior and a nice stereo system. All I need is Jesus and some heavy bass, yo.

snowfox090 : If God is his truck, I'm betting He comes with AM radio and dodgy brakes. After all, having nice possessions is a sin.

rubyfire : Then I suppose Satan is a brand spankin' new Mercedes that gets a million miles per gallon.

Somehow I picture that Buddha would be a Chevy.

snowfox090 : Naturally. Of course, he'd probably up and die on you the day after you made your final payment on him. The Devil's tricky like that. ;)

Krishna would be a bright blue VW Beetle, I think. Don't know how or why, but it just seems right.

pert_embrace : I have to agree. However, my only knowledge of Krishna stems from pop culture. Beetles are rather trendy.

snowfox090 : He always seemed a little laid-back and playful to me, although I don't know much about him.

rubyfire : Satan has no warranty! Mwahahaha! The evilness!

Zeus would be a dark purple Thunderbird, original, of course.

snowfox090 : Aphrodite has to be a bright pink sporty convertible. She's the original Barbie girl, after all. XD

rubyfire : Gah! The originator of things pink and tasteless.

I hope I'm not going to Hell for wondering if Jesus has good gas milage.

snowfox090 : Of course! Having bad gas mileage is wasteful and decadent. *nod* That's why Jesus isn't an SUV.

If you're going to Hell for this, I'll probably be saving a seat for you.

rubyfire : Don't bother saving a seat. I'm pretty sure I'm building the tracks in front of the trains that bring in damned souls.

I've told waaay too many horrible jokes to get into Heaven.

snowfox090 : I dunno, I'm pretty sure God has a weird sense of humor. How else do you explain the duck-billed platypus? It took a twisted mind to come up with that.
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