Book: And the whole point of Titian's portraits of young men is clearly SEX.
Me: Excuse me?
Book: Yes! Sex! Just look at them! The sensual mouths, the soft hair, the coy glances, the feminine poses! The gloves, by Jove! Clearly they do not conform to the male archetype, and thus they are nothing but sensual symbols to be eyed by women! Maybe even... by men! Maybe there is (dare I say it) homoerotic boysex somewhere in here!
Me: Wow. It can't be easy, using such big words when all you’re really trying to do is drool.