And The Clocks Were Striking Thirteen (_redpanda_) wrote in metaquotes,
And The Clocks Were Striking Thirteen
_redpanda_
metaquotes

notapipe discusses ways the Harry Potter books could end

The post is goes from clever to downright silly:

C) Harry fires a chi blast of love at Voldemort and Voldemort melts into a puddle of goo. Which, being goo, is worse than having a corpse. Or, you know, destroys Voldemort's soul. This is lame.

D) Sort of like C, except Harry just hugs Voldemort. Lamer.

E) Harry, possibly along with all of his friends, performs the Care Bear Stare on Voldemort. Even more lame, but very Saturday Morning Cartoon retro, so 20-somethings may think it is the best thing ever.

F) Some variant of C-E, except instead of killing Voldemort, it transforms him from the Dark Lord into affable ol' Tom. They live happily ever after, because "the Dark Lord" has been killed by his transformation in to Tom.

G) Perhaps the room has a MACHINE THAT TURNS LOVE INTO LASERS!

H) Love Bomb?

I) Some more serious variant of G & H.

But what if it isn't love? Well, it could always be "dumbfuckness," which Harry has a lot of. The room could be full of stupid people and Voldemort could just really not like stupid people. It could also be chicken pox. That killed the martians...

-- the rest :)
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