Yeah, so there's a major problem with my laptop.
It won't let me sleep.
No. It sits on my bed and it says, "Hey! Go check your LJ! It's been 10 minutes since you last read it and you don't want to miss anything!"
So I do. And I say, "Ok, there haven't been any updates to my Friends List the last 20 times I checked. Now I'm definitely going to bed."
And my laptop laughs and laughs and laughs, and when it composes itself, it says, ever so sweetly, "Don't you think you should check just once more? Just in case?"
"Well, alright. It won't take but a minute, and then I really will go to sleep," I respond.
*GASP!* An update! "Thank you, Laptop, for making me check once more! And, oooh, look, it's a long entry from someone I don't know! I must read the whole thing and then peruse their userinfo!"
And my laptop just sits there congratulating itself, as its evil plan is set into motion.
"Good night, Jessica!" it sings. "Sleep well! I'll keep an eye on your LJ for you! Don't worry!" Then it hums *Rock-a-bye Baby" until I nod off.
I only wish I knew what its evil plan was... --jtersesk