ACHILLES: Hello, Odysseus! Have you met my COUSIN? This is my COUSIN Patroclus! Say hello, COUSIN! I'll tell you what, MY COUSIN, we'll continue SPARRING later, after MY GOOD FRIEND Odysseus leaves--
ODYSSEUS: Don't drag me into this, girlfriend.
Seriously, watch Sean Bean's face. He ain't buying it either. He's got that "Uh huh, sure, that's your fifth 'cousin' this year" look.