Irony (ironychan) wrote in metaquotes,
Irony
ironychan
metaquotes

spectacular talks about her day:

KOY: *Wanders down the stairs, collapses against wall. Lays there motionless.*
MOTHER: Come to the store with me, daughter of mine that is not fully awake and cannot be held responsible for her actions at such an early hour.
KOY: Okiedokie.

MOTHER: Oh look, fudge cookie ice cream.
KOY: We shouldn't get it.
MOTHER: No, no we shouldn't.
KOY: *Opens freezer door.*
ICE CREAM: *Falls out.*
MOTHER: It's a sign from God. We should get it.
KOY: Yes, yes we should.

KOY: MUM. OBSERVE. A PITCHER.
MOTHER: We have a pitcher.
KOY: Yes I realise we have a pitcher but our pitcher is inferior to this pitcher.
MOTHER: They're exactly the same.
KOY: No they're not. This pitcher is pink. And comes with cups. That are also pink. We should buy it.
MOTHER: We have a pitcher, Kayleigh.
KOY: AN INFERIOR PITCHER.

KOY: *Chases mother down fruit aisle with shopping trolley.*
MOTHER: *Sings Jaws theme loudly and dodges behind bins of carefully arranged melons.*
OLD MEN: *Stop and stare.*
OLD LADIES: *Scandalised.*

KOY AND MOTHER: *Talk enthusiastically about lesbian witches while picking out basil.*
OLD MEN: *Stop and stare.*
OLD LADIES: *Scandalised.*
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