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What does Disney teach YOUR kids?
hawklady wrote in metaquotes
(QWP from elisel, post here)

Disney's positive message to kids:

OOC MUCK conversations sometimes go strange places. I'm Lulu; a friend is Karilei.)

Lulu says, "You know..."
Karilei says, "Hm?"
Lulu says, "...Really, the Lion King sends a terrible message: Brawn will win out over brains. It doesn't matter if you're ten times as smart as the big dumb brute on the throne; the doofy football-player type will always beat you up in the end."
Karilei says, "Disney tends to do that rather often, it seems."
Karilei says, "Little Mermaid: 'Defy your parents long enough, and they will eventually give in and even support your marriage to the finless bastards. :D'"
Karilei ponders. "We can make more!"
Lulu says, "Mulan: High treason is surely the way to win your leader's support and the love of your life!"
Karilei says, "Heeee hee hee."
Karilei says, "Beauty and the Beast."
Karilei says, "'If your boyfriend is violent, stick with him! He'll turn back into a prince.'"
Karilei says, "(Even if he almost kills your dad.)"
Karilei says, "(And then does kill your ex.)"
Lulu says, ""Aladdin: Lying and slavery are okay, so long as you quit while you're ahead...."
Karilei says, "Pirates of the Caribbean: 'How much morality applies to you is inversely proprotionate to the amount of eyeliner you wear.'"
Lulu says, "Hunchback of Notre Dame: You're ugly. You won't ever get the girl. Live with it."
Karilei says, "....augh my mind went awful places with Sleeping beauty. ;.;"
Lulu says, "Oh, dear. You'd better share."
Karilei says, "Sleeping Beauty: 'Remember, girls: You don't have to do a thing except lie on your back until your prince comes.'"
Lulu says, "YOU WIN."
Lulu says, "Hmmm."
Lulu says, "Hercules: Your daddy doesn't love you enough to let your girlfriend marry into the family. You'll have to abandon your inheritance and elope."
Karilei laughs, yes.
Lulu says, "Man, I'm just never going to top Sleeping Beauty."
Lulu says, "Ever."
Lulu says, "...Er. No pun intended."
Karilei was about to say.
Lulu weeps bitterly.
* * *

XD Both of you will be receiving a shiny new intrawebs in the mail tomorrow morning. Snail mail in all....

...I always knew Disney was evil...

Oh god, that's hilarious. Now I'm gonna be giggling watching those movies with the kids I babysit.

So if I do the drag-queen-gone-wrong look, I can get away with just about anything....hmmm....*plots*

Can you just include the OP's userID somewhere in the post so people who don't follow the link know who to attribute it to? :)


Done - sorry about that. elisel now credited in the original.

Genius :P

Yeah, I don't know how you could beat the 'moral' of Sleeping Beauty.

Bambi -- Something horrible will happen to your parents.

Dumbo -- If you aren't pretty enough, other elephants will hate you.

Snow White -- Your the prettiest thing ever born, of course every woman is out to get you and the men cry themselves silly at the thought of losing you.


Maybe that is why my kids would never watch the Disney Movies. LOL LOL LOL!

Lulu says, "Man, I'm just never going to top Sleeping Beauty."

*dies and is DED* Wow.

How much morality applies to you is inversely proprotionate to the amount of eyeliner you wear.

Someone needs to make that into an icon.

Yeah, I threw it together in five seconds as I am running out the door to work. Well, five minutes, so I'll be late. Hurrah for lateness. It sucks, but if you want it, remember to credit elisel for the quote (and for great justice!).

LOL, yes, I too award you quite the collection of internets.

PotC was my favorite as well, with Sleeping Beauty being a close second.

Hee! You made my day by using my icon! Thanks!!!

Just makes me think of the Drowsy Chaperone:

"Roman Bartelli chewing the scenery! You certainly couldn't get away with a performance like that nowadays, could you? No - mature, contemporary audiences are too sophisticated to enjoy broad racial stereotypes on the stage so - we banish them to Disney. Let the children sort it out."

I like the Hunchback one, myself.

I usually really hate when people try to vilify Disney, but this made me laugh.

Same here on both points. :)

holy snot, that's great.

Yeah, I'm going to go curl up in a corner and imitate my icon. My poor childhood....

Oh, who am I kidding? I giggled, I chuckled, I sporfled and squee'd. Brilliant. XD

Robin Hood- taxes are bad, getting back together with your ex will not be disatrous and stealing from the government will make you a hero

(must have been written by Tom DeLay)

. . . it doesn't help that in the original Sleeping Beauty, the prince did much more than kiss her.

Yeah. When she woke up, it was with twins.

And then there's Anne Rice's version.

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Actually, poor Quasimodo DOES get the girl in Hunchback of Notre Dame II. /disneygeekery

...And I had lived without knowing that Disney had raped Victor Hugo that much. The original was bad enough, but *FACEPALM* at the sequel.

That is just so much win.

Snow White: Step-parents suck. Kill them.

...before they kill you

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Cinderella - beauty is better than common sense or survival skills, and much better than getting an education - but you still need powerful friends to give you a real advantage.

Little Mermaid -- it's okay, at age 16, to use your new human legs, and not your voice or personality, to get a prince to marry you after having known you for three days.

The trouble I've had with most Disney movies is that the theme is some version of this:

"Be yourself—as long as the yourself you're being is good, kind, moral, honest, and attractive. If you're an evil bastard, you're out of luck."

In the immortal words of Joss Whedon, "Always be yourself... unless you suck."

"Pirates of the Caribbean: 'How much morality applies to you is inversely proprotionate to the amount of eyeliner you wear.'"

So much win :D

Cinderella: Yes, beauty and appearance is everything.

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The lesson of Disney is that of dysfunctional and/or broken families.

Ah, and this it why the Jain loves Disney!

I won't have to corrupt my little cousins (let alone my own someday-children ^_^).


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